


Stars Can't Shine Without Darkness

by noice_smort



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Childhood Friends, Baby jake and amy, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Mentions of Cancer, The Santiago's essentially adopt Jake, childhood cancer
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-16
Updated: 2019-06-03
Packaged: 2019-10-11 00:35:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 42,955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17436482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noice_smort/pseuds/noice_smort
Summary: "Jake is eight years old when he gets new neighbors. A few weeks before school starts a large family moves into the house next to his."A nice little angsty fluffy story where the Santiago's move next door to Jake when he's a kid and they become part of the team that help raise him. Jake also gets diagnosed with cancer and the Santiago's essentially adopt him as their own, because I hate myself but I can't help writing sick kid angst.





	1. Chapter 1

Jake is eight years old when he gets new neighbors. A few weeks before school starts a large family moves into the house next to his. From what he says there are a lot of boys, and he hopes one of them will become his friend. He only has one really good friend and that is Gina, but she's like a sister to him because they have known each other for so long. At this point he's not sure if he considers Gina a girl, to him she's just Gina. After curiously watching the family as they moved in once they seemed settled his mom dragged him over to say hi and welcome them to the neighborhood. While Jake was excited about meeting his new potential best friend, he certainly did not want his mom to be accompanying him when he did so. Despite voicing these concerns here he was standing on his new neighbors front porch with his Mom. After waiting for a few moments a young girl answered the door, of course in a house full of boys would a girl answer the door when he knocked. He couldn't even be mad though, he thought she was kind of cute though he would never admit that to anyone. After a moment of awkward staring his mom nudged him to introduce himself. 

"Hi, I'm Jake and we live next door! My mom and I wanted to come say hi, and we brought you cookies!" He said excitedly, once he found his words. The girl stared at him for a moment before yelling something over her shoulder in a language he didn't understand. It sounded vaguely familiar, but he knew it wasn't Hebrew which was the only other language he spoke. 

"I'm Amy!" The girl says sticking her hand out to Jake. He smiles shyly and takes it, only to be meet by a strong grip which he was not expecting. 

The two stand there smiling at each other hands locked together until a women, who he guesses to be Amy's Mom comes to the door. As the his Mom and Amy's mom begin talk, Mrs. Santiago as he later finds out her name to be, tells the two of them to go out in play in the backyard while they talk. Before he knows it Amy is dragging him through the house, he notes the chaos that seems to surround them as they make it to the backyard. After a few minutes of debating what to play, Jake's suggestion of Ninja turtles gets immediately voted down, they decide on soccer. They played together for the rest of the afternoon and by the end of it they agreed to be best friends. 

For the next few months the two were inseparable, they were very lucky to end up in the same third grade class, along with Gina who was quite the addition to their trio and Jake was thrilled that he got to spend all his time with his "sister" and best friend. Jake and Amy turned out to be better for each other than anyone could have imagined. Jake would help Amy with her English when she would get frustrated and Amy would help Jake with his math and tried to help him write neater. Though neither one seemed to work that well as he struggled with math immensely and his writing resembled scratches more than it did letters. Overall though they loved being in each other's company and spent every day together until one day Jake didn't come into school because he was sick. He was out for most of the week and she figured he most have something really bad if he had missed several days of school. Amy missed her best friend and it felt like ages since she had gotten to play with him. One day when she came home from school her mom sat her down on the couch and explained that Jake was very sick and that he would have to start going to the hospital to receive a special kind of medicine that would hopefully make him all better, but that he wouldn't be his regular self for a while and she may not seem as often or he may not want to do the same things as he usual did. Upon hearing this news Amy did this best thing she could think of, make him a get better card. 

Jake was not exactly thrilled that he was spending his Thursday morning in a white hospital room getting stabbed in the chest, he never though he'd say this but he really would rather be in school right now. Even though school was hard for him, his teacher was nice, Amy and Gina were there and it was overall a much better experience then what he was currently going through. This week had been a whirlwind for him, he woke Monday and didn't feel well so him Mom called out of work to stay home with him because his dad was flying, he was content laying around all day watching movies and couch snuggling with his Mom. That evening during dinner he ended up getting a nose bleed, he'd had a few before in fact he had even had one in school the week before, so he wasn't that concerned and neither was his Mom until the bleeding didn't stop. He held a rag to his nose for what felt like hours until his Mom just gave up and took him to the hospital, when they were there they did some very painful tests, much to Jake's dismay. And eventually they had results he had something called cancer, he wasn't sure what it was but his Mom seemed to be really sad, he tried to calm her down and tell her that he would be okay but nothing seemed to work. He had never seen his Mom cry like that before, unfortunately though it wouldn't be the last. He had to stay in the hospital overnight and surgery the next day. He was asleep for that, but he hurt a lot when he woke up. His Mom never left his side though, which made him happy, he wished his Dad could be here though. They were able to go home following his surgery, he wanted to go see Amy but his Mom wouldn't let him because she was afraid he'd get hurt and he had to go back to the hospital the next day to get his medicine and that he should be well rested. This lead him to where he was now sitting in a hospital bed watching cartoons, not even the good ones, with a needle stuck in his chest and feeling generally bad. Fortunately at some point he got to go home, he still feels tired and like he's going to be sick, but he would much rather do that curled up on his couch with his favorite stuffed animal cuddled up with his Mom. He fell asleep on the car ride and was thrilled when he woke up in his couch wrapped in a blanket with his favorite stuffed animal and a Disney movie playing in the background. He smiled as he snuggled back under the blanket and tried to fight off the feeling that he was going to be sick. 

"Mom, I don't feel good!" Jake called to his Mom, after he tried fighting of the nausea on his own. 

"Do you feel like you're going to throw up?" She asked sitting next to him on the couch, she hated seeing her little boy in so much pain. 

"Uh Huh" He said meekly as he leaned his head over the bucket his mom was holding and throwing up a little 

This went on for a few minutes until the wave passed and he felt his mom lay him back down on the couch and gave him kiss on the forehead before taking the bucket and wondering off somewhere. He drifted back to sleep and woke up a few hours later to fighting. In the 8 years Jake had been alive he grown very accustomed to his parents fighting to him that was normal. Normally their fights dissipated or fell asleep so he always assumed that everything worked alright. Tonight seemed different though he heard his mom yelling at his dad about not being there for him and his dad saying that he couldn't take it, which really must have pissed his mom because he had never heard her yell like this before. The yelling continued to drag on as Jake tried to go back to sleep, he had a headache and thought he might throw up again. At a certain point his Mom came back in the room with his backpack she picked him and made sure he was wrapped tightly in his blanket and had his dinosaur stuffed animal with him. She explained that her and dad were having an argument and that they wanted him to get some rest so he was going to spend some time at the Santiago's. 

Camilla Santiago was quite surprised when Karen Peralta came knocking on her door with what was clearly a very sick Jake. Camilla knew that Jake had started his chemo today and was confused as to why his mother was bringing him over. She invited Karen inside and told her to put Jake on the couch and get him comfortable, once he seemed to fall asleep, Karen motioned for to follow her into the next room clearly not wanting Jake to hear whatever she was about to say. Karen explained that Roger was having issues with their sons diagnosis and was thinking of leaving because he couldn't handle it and Karen suspected he was cheating on her anyway. She explained that this was something that she didn't want Jake to hear and would explain to him whatever the outcome was, plus he was feeling generally unwell since he had started treatment earlier today and she wanted him to try and get some rest. Camilla completely understood the situation and told Karen that Jake was more than welcome to stay while she figured things out with her husband. Karen gave her a quick hug before giving Jake a hug and a kiss before going out to finish her argument. In her opinion Roget couldn't have picked a worse time to decide that he didn't want to be a parent anymore. As she watched as the once normally hyperactive child sleep on her couch, she tried to imagine how anybody could leave this amazing child. 

"Mom, why is Jake here?" She was, snapped out of her thoughts as her eight year old came down the stairs noticed that her best friend was here. 

"Come here mija." Camilla said, patting at a spot next to her on the couch. She explained that Jake's parents were fighting and his mom wanted him to stay here so that way they could some rest. Amy nodded intently as her mother told her to keep an eye on him while she went to go check on dinner and the other kids. 

When Jake awoke up his was disoriented, this clearly wasn't his house. He thought maybe it was Nana's because it seemed to be familiar, but he couldn't tell in his groggy state. Then his feeling of nausea returned and he blindly reached around for a bucket knowing that he was going to be sick, unable to find one he muttered out that he was going to be sick before throwing up on someone's very nice floor. It was when he heard Amy's voice calling out to her Mom that he realized he was at the Santiago's house, now he felt even worse about throwing up on their floor knowing how they liked to keep their house nice and neat. 

"Amy?" He questioned groggily, once he had stopped throwing up and noticing her figure beside him. 

"Don't worry Jake, I got my mom and she's going to help make you all better." Amy explained very matter of fact. 

"Oh mijo!" Camilla cooed as she saw Jake sitting on the couch, his eyes half shut and pool vomit on the floor next to her couch. 

"I'm sorry Mrs. Santiago! I didn't mean to throw up on your floor, I know how clean you like your house!" He exclaimed, his voice laced with both exhaustion and emotion. 

"It's okay mijo. It was an accident." She soothed as she picked him up off the couch and rubbed up and down his back. Quickly and quietly whispering for Amy to go get a cold wash cloth as she noticed that he had started sweating, which she guessed was from throwing up. Amy was in awe of her best friend and did as her mother told her, she had never seen him this sick before and that scared her. 

"But I threw up all over your floor and made a mess." He was clearly very concerned about the matter, to the point where he was almost in tears. 

"It's fine, Jake it was accident. No one's mad at you. I know you had to go to the hospital today to get some medicine and that it makes you really sick. No one's mad at you sweetie and we can always clean it up, it's just hardwood that means it's really easy to clean up. " Camilla tried to console him as he had now reduced himself to tears. Though she believed that it wasn't really about the vomit on the floor and more about how generally unwell he was feeling and that he probably wished he was home now with his mom.

"Is he going to be okay?" Amy asked, handing her mother the wash cloth she had asked for. 

"He's going to be fine, this is just something that happens because of the medicine he has to take. It makes it seem like he has the stomach flu or something. Now can you go upstairs and get Luis and tell him to come down here and help me." Amy nodded and ran upstairs to get her older brother as Camilla still tended to what was becoming an increasingly tired Jake, who was about half asleep on her shoulder by the time she put the cloth on the back of his neck. 

"Feels good." Jake mumbled at the feeling of something cold touching his back. He hadn't realized it in the midst of everything but he was actually quite hot and was grateful that Mrs. Santiago was doing this for him, he felt bad however, knowing that she had a family to take care of. "You don't have to do this Mrs. Santiago, I'm fine now I know you have other things to worry about. I'll be okay." 

"Jake I can deal with everything else later, Mr. Santiago will be home soon and Amy went to get Luis who will help me out for the time being. This is not something you need to worry about right now, just relax and try to feel better." 

"Hey Mom, what do you need help with?" Luis asked bounding down the stairs, taking stock of the vomit on the ground and his younger sister's best friend who appeared to be asleep in his mother's arms. 

"First off you can start by helping me clean up, the vomit on the floor. Then I have to finish up on dinner so watch the other kids and make sure they don't come in here, he finally feel back asleep and I don't want him being disturbed. Amy's going to stay here and keep an eye on him and make sure he's doing okay." Camilla explained to her eldest, as she laid a sleeping Jake Peralta back down on the couch making sure he was comfortable before getting up. "Amy why don't you put on a movie that you and Jake like and make sure he's okay. If he says he's going to feel sick again, give him this bucket to throw up in so that way he doesn't do it on the floor." Amy nodded, taking the bucket from her mother as she went to go find a movie that Jake would like they didn't have Ninja turtles so she'd have to figure something out. 

"I know you told Amy that he was really sick, but what exactly does he have that he has to go to the hospital for?" Luis asked once his sister was finally out earshot. He understood that if his mom hadn't told Amy the whole truth that she probably didn't want Amy to know. 

"He has cancer. Leukemia according to his mom, it effects his blood. He just started treatment today, Mrs. Peralta dropped him off her because she and his dad are fighting about him, something about his dad not wanting to deal with all this, apparently he's thinking of leaving, and she didn't want him to hear." Camilla explained quietly, she certainly didn't need Jake or Amy finding out. 

"Damn that sucks, he's a good kid." That was all Luis could comment, there was no book he could read or research he could do that would help with finding out that you're little sister's best friend and basically adopted younger brother has cancer and his parents are probably going to get divorced because of it and how to deal with that.

The pair worked in silence while the faint sounds of a Disney movie played in the background. In that span of time Jake had only woken up once, spoken something nobody understood, both Camilla and Amy were 95% sure his comment was in Hebrew which he would lapse into occasionally, and immediately feel back asleep. Which relieved everybody. Everything remained quiet and calm until Victor came home. His coming home alerted all the other kids who came rushing in from all corners of the house, Luis didn't stand a chance at stopping them running right past where Jake was. Luis hoped that maybe somehow Jake was exhausted enough to sleep through the running of the bulls that was his siblings, but it wasn't and Jake up groggy and disoriented claiming that he was going to be sick again. Fortunately the Santiago's were much more prepared this time, Luis was there holding a bucket under Jake's mouth while Amy ran to get their mom again. Camilla was by his side within moments, coaxing him through it and whispering things in Spanish which he found to be oddly soothing despite not understanding a single word she said. Soon enough the wave had passed and the chaos that that moment had brought subsided and Camilla went to go greet her husband who stood shocked in the door. 

"Sorry about all that, it's been a crazy few hours." Camilla told her husband, wishing she had gotten a chance to notify him of what to expect when he came home. 

"Why do we have a sleeping Jake Peralta, shouldn't he be at home. I know you said he started chemo today?" Victor asked, noticing the sleeping 8 year old in his wife's arms who was clinging to her like she was his own mother. 

"Karen and Roger are fighting again, a bad one apparently, and she didn't want Jake to hear so he's been staying with us so he can rest. He's mostly slept since being here, we had once incident where he threw up on the floor but that was my fault for not having a bucket ready for him, Karen told me he was nauseous and that he'd probably throw up."

"That would explain the overwhelming smell of bleach" Victor laughed, noting how strongly the house smelled of cleaning supplies. "Do you need help with anything, I can work on dinner or watch him?" 

"Dinner's actually almost done, I made enchiladas' so they're in the oven right now. I was going to heat up some soup for Jake real quick, considering the fact that he's thrown up twice since being here I don't think he can stomach much. So you can either have soup duty or watch him with Amy, you're choice." 

"You've done your fair share of caring for him today, so I'll take over Jake duty. Plus I know how much you hate vomit." Victor said, taking a sleeping Jake from his wife's arms.

"I've got him set up in the living room, Amy put on a movie for the two of them to watch so if you set him down and get him comfortable he should be okay. Just keep an eye on him and make sure his throw up stays contained to a bucket that I put in there." Camilla explained as she ventured into the kitchen to check on dinner. Victor could only chuckle on his wife could have all 8 of kids under control, plus be tending to their gravely ill neighbor's child who was practically their ninth child. 

"Dad?" Jake questioned as Victor moved into the living room and placing him down on the couch. 

"It's Mr. Santiago Jake, sorry." Victor explained sadly, he knew that Jake admired his dad a lot but Roger wasn't around often resulting in a less than stellar relationship between the 2. 

"It's okay, I'm used to him not being here." Jake mumbled curing up into Amy's side as she moved to sit next him. Jake wasn't lying when he said that, in recent years his dad seemed to be around less and less and at this point Jake was more surprised when his dad was around. 

Despite that being true it always hurt to hear kids verbalize how used to crappy situations they were. In his many years of being a police officer countless kids had to told him that they thought they abuse was normal and that was what all parents did to their kids. Even though Jake hadn’t been abused or molested in anyway shape or form it still hurt Victor to hear that Jake had simply come to terms with his Dad being primarily absent in his life. 

As Amy sat absently watching The Little Mermaid with her best friend asleep at her side, she couldn't help but wonder what was going on. She knew Jake was sick and that his parents were fighting, which was why he was their house to begin with. What she wanted to know was what was different about this fight from past one's, according to the stories Jake told her, his parents fought all the time and apparently he just learned to ignore them. Was he here because he was sick and his mom really did just want him to get some rest or was there something more. Jake had told Amy on more than one occasion that his dad would leave and then come back, sometimes he'd be gone for days and no one really knew where he went, she wondered if this was a more serious version of one of those situations. Whatever was going on it sucked that he was going through it, she knew that if she were really sick like he'd been she would rather be in her own bed snuggled under blankets with a good book and away from everyone. But here Jake was in the middle of a house that wasn't his, without his parents and was sicker then she had ever been her life. She was snapped out of her thoughts when her mom called everyone for dinner. 

"Jake wake up, we got to go eat dinner." Amy said, lightly shaking Jake trying to get him to wake up without potentially upsetting his stomach. 

"But I'm so tired and your couch is so warm." Jake complained burrowing further beneath the blanket that was wrapped around him. 

"Why don't you just go to the table with your blanket?" 

"You think your mom would let me?" 

"I think that she can make an exception for you considering the fact that you've thrown up twice since coming here." 

Jake thought for a moment and decided that he probably did need to eat something and it was best to not argue with any Santiago and just do as he was told. He pulled himself off the couch and wrapped his blanket tighter around himself, he either got up too fast or it was because of the medicine he was on but as soon as he stood up the room started spinning. He grabbed the nearest thing and tried to balance himself, which unfortunately for him happened to be Amy, but it was either her shoulder or fall to the ground so he would have to swallow his pride for the time being and just focus on getting the room to stop moving. Finally he no longer felt like he was going to collapse if he tried to move so he moved toward the kitchen, his arm still tightly grabbing hold of Amy's shoulder as he still wasn't feeling too great. 

"Mrs. Santiago, I brought my blanket with me to the dinner table cause I was still cold is that okay? Cause if it's not I can go put it back on the couch." Jake asked standing at the entrance to the Santiago's kitchen, he really hoped that she'd say yes because quite frankly he didn't think he could make it all the way to the couch and back without collapsing at some point. 

"Yes Jake you can have your blanket at the table. Now take a seat with everyone else so we can start dinner." Camilla chuckled as she watched him grab on to her daughter like a lifeline and guide him to the table. She placed a bowl of soup in front of him which he gladly accepted as she helped deal out enchiladas to some of her younger children. As she sat down at the end of the table with her husband Jake and her kids feel into easy conversation. 

"So Jake, my mom said you have to go the hospital for treatment what's wrong with you. What exactly do you have?" Manny asked, he was 10 years old and just genuinely curious as to what he had. 

"I have something called cancer. I'm not really quite sure what it is but according to my mom I'm really sick and that's why I have to go to the hospital to get medicine. I don't like it very much though, it hurts a lot and it makes me feel all gross and according mom I have to keep going back until it's all gone and that could take months." He exclaimed, at the mention of his disease Amy made a mental note to either ask or her mom about it and to do research. 

"Speaking of medicine, I almost forgot Jake you have to take these with dinner according to your mom." Camilla said getting up and going over to the kitchen counter where a cup of pills was sitting. 

"Aww man more medicine! At least I can just swallow these, when I get medicine at the hospital the doctor gives it to me through a needle in my chest which kinda sucks but it doesn't hurt once it's in though." 

"You get your medicine through a needle in your chest!" Amy exclaimed all wide eyed, now she really needed to go research her best friends condition. This was binder worthy. 

"Yeah, this is where it goes!" Jake explained lifting up his shirt and pointing to a raised part of his chest that had a scar running by it. Most of the Santiago's sat shocked, however Camilla was on the verge of tears at seeing one the first physical manifestations of childhood cancer, and Amy was curious and her mind flooded with questions that she wasn't sure if she should ask. As the room feel into an uncomfortable silence Jake got concerned. "Did I make you guys upset or something because if I did I'm really sorry. I know my mom's been really sad all week because of me, I didn't mean to make you all sad as well." 

"You didn’t make anyone upset and you have nothing to be sorry about." 

"You sure, cause I can stop talking about it. My dad said I wasn't allowed to talk about anything about why I'm sick." Jake offered, continuing to eat his soup. 

"No you can talk about it if you want, it's good to talk about things like this." Victor countered, he knew that his family was not the panicle of open communication, he had 8 kids and all of them were very competitive. However, he and his wife had instilled it in their kids that it was okay to talk to them about more serious concepts and they often did. Particularly some of the older boys, and Amy who knew too much for her own good. He knew that it was important for his family to talk about the things they encountered because he saw what happened to people who couldn't properly vent their feelings and talk to people. 

Everyone fell back into easy conversation, this time no one brought up Jake, why he was sick, and his never ending issues that his parents seem to have. Jake offered up his comments about the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and the Mets, something that none of the Santiago's and Amy were well versed in and they talked about school and things Jake didn't totally understand like science. As they talked comfortably through dinner Jake ended up falling asleep in his chair, with a half-eaten bowl of soup in front of him and his hand holding Amy's under the table. No one had the heart to wake him and get him to move to a more comfortable spot somewhere else in the house. So they let him be, he didn't wake up as Camilla started clearing plates, when one of the twins dropped something on floor, not even when the doorbell rang. Victor got up to get it and knew it wasn't a good sign when he saw a red eyed, disheveled looking Karen Peralta at his front door. Quickly he invited her inside and told her to sit down in the kitchen and eat something. Camilla and him sat down across from her, as Luis got the hint to usher the rest of the kids out of the kitchen, grabbing Jake in his arms and Amy quickly following him to give the adults space to talk. It was there that Karen for the first time verbalized that she was now a single parent, all because her dick of a husband couldn't keep it in his pants and didn't want a sick child. 

Jake wasn't quite sure how or when he'd made it from Santiago's kitchen table to living room couch but that didn't matter because when he woke up he heard one sound that he only heard when bad things happened, his mom crying. He wasn't quite sure how he'd heard it over all the noise but he did and he needed to go and make sure his mom was okay. He was still tired and felt like he was going to fall over if he stood and made any movements forward, so he enlisted Amy's help. She got up and grabbed his arms has he heaved himself up, she made sure he didn't fall over right then and there. Once they were both sure that Jake completely had his balance he firmly put his hand on her shoulder to keep himself upright as the moved forward. They were able to make it to the kitchen without any incidents, he made them stand outside and listen for a moment before entering. He needed to know what was going on before he could try to comfort her, but no one said anything his mom was just sitting there with her head in her hands and Camilla's hand on her back. 

"Mom, what's wrong?" Jake asked, his hand still on Amy as he made himself known for to his mother. 

"Oh Jake!" All it took for Karen Peralta to start crying again was a look at her highly concerned son's face who was only standing because his best friend was keeping him. She knew that Roger's leaving was going to destroy him, so she picked him up and held him tight, words not being able to form. 

"It's okay mom, it's okay. I'm okay! What's wrong?" Jake didn't have much experience comforting her, only the few occasional times after his parents got into arguments but he had never seen her this upset before. He put his tiny hand on her back and rubbed it like she always did for him, he knew it made him feel better so he thought it might make her feel better as well. 

"Jake we need to talk." She sighed sitting down in a chair at the Santiago's table, her son in her lap. "You know how your dad and I were fighting this afternoon." She paused waiting for Jake to nod. "Well we got into a really bad fight and I said some things and he said some things and your dad well, he, he left." Tears started to run down her face again, she had no idea how to explain to him that this was not his fault and that his dad was straight up a bad person. 

When Jake's mom told him the news he cried and held onto her even tighter, he knew that it sucked for him but it was even worse for his mom who was now stuck with him and no help. "We'll be fine mom, I promise. I'll start doing better in school, I'll be less loud, I won't complain to the doctor's at all when they try to give me my medicine, I'll eat all my vegetables, I'll… I'll.." Jake was rambling and trying to think of things he could do to make his moms life easier. 

"Jake, I want you to know that none of this is your fault. And I don't want you to change who you are, because you are perfect." Karen was touched by her son's frantic rambling of trying to think of things that would make her feel better, he had always been her little protector. 

"He left because of me, because I'm sick didn't he. I'm broken and he doesn't want me anymore!" He was not one to let all his emotions out at once, but he couldn't keep it in with this realization. 

"Jake you are not broken, and he did not leave because of you! I know you idolize him, but the truth is he is not as good of a person as you thought he was. But Jake I want you to know that I'm always going to be here for you and I'm never going to leave you! Neither is Nana or Gina…or." 

"Or me." Amy interjected, she had watched her best friends world come crashing down in a matter of minutes, it seemed like this was the least she could do try and make him feel better. 

"Or Amy, or really any of the Santiago's for that matter. Jake you're an amazing kid and you have plenty of people who love you! None of this is your fault and we're going to be fine. I don't want you worrying about this were going to get through this just fine." Karen comforted, Jake was clutching onto her as if he were to let go she would leave him too. This continued for a little while longer, Jake ended up falling asleep in her lap still clutching at her to make sure he was safe. 

"I don't know how I'm going to do this. I can't take off work to be with him because we need the money and I can guarantee you that Roger is not going to be sending me any kind of money to help with his bills." Karen sighed, she knew that getting her son the treatment he needed while also making money so that they could afford it was going to be a difficult balance. 

"Karen we'd be more than happy to help you, we can take Jake to appointments and watch after him while you work We'd offer to help you financially, but we're pretty tight there ourselves with all our kids." Camilla offered, she knew how rough of a position Karen was put in and wanted to help in any way she could. 

"Camilla, that's so kind of you but that's too much to ask I couldn't…." Karen started, but was quickly cut off by Victor 

"We really don't mind Karen. You and Jake are like a part of our family, plus I know that you would do the same for any of our kids if the situation was reversed." 

"Are you sure? I wouldn't want to put you all in a bad position." 

"Karen we don't mind really." Victor smiled, putting his hand of Karen's free one. 

"Alright, we'll get through this."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please be nice y'all this is my first fic on here. Comments and any constructive criticism are greatly appreciated. Hope you enjoy!


	2. Chapter 2

After that fateful night of finding out that Jake had cancer and his dad had left him, Amy Santiago made sure to do research and ask questions, lots of questions. After Jake left that night and her mother was putting her to bed, she finally got up the courage to ask what cancer was and if Jake was going to be okay. Camilla was not one to sugar coat things to her kids and she knew how much Jake meant to Amy so she figured it was best to be honest with her. So she sat down on the edge of her daughter's bed and explained everything to her daughter. Amy listened quietly asking questions for clarifications and making mental notes things to do and ask Jake. The biggest thing she picked up on was that her mother said that Jake could lose his hair, Jake didn't care about his appearance that much but she knew he cared about his hair deeply. She could think of all the times she'd go and touch his hair just to annoy him, she'd have to find a way to help get through that without being too sad. He had always made sure that she was always happy, now it was her turn to do the same for him. 

Jake didn't have to go back to the hospital until that weekend, which he was thrilled about until the weekend came around. Now he was sitting in the Santiago's car on his way to Brooklyn Methodist, he really was not thrilled about the idea of having to continuously going to the hospital multiple times a week for months on end but his mom said that he had to keep doing it if he wanted to get better. Which he did so he put up with it, Amy was coming with him to the hospital today so he thought that maybe it would be better than last time. Not that his mom wasn't could company, he actually wished she could take him but she had picked up a second job to help pay hospital bills, but she had spent the duration of his last visit alternating between crying and stepping out to call someone. So really any kind of human interaction would qualify as being better than his last visit. 

Soon enough they arrived at Brooklyn Methodist and had to head inside, Jake slipped his hand into Amy's as he felt Camilla place a hand on his back. Despite the brave face he had been putting on in front of everyone he was out right terrified and he knew that his nerves were worse because his mom wasn't here with him. He knew Mrs. Santiago was going to take good care of him and that she and Amy wouldn't think any less of him for crying in front of them, but nothing would be as comforting as his Mom rubbing his back or her hands through his hair whispering things to calm him down. As they entered the hospital and were lead up to a room Jake felt Amy's hand tighten around his, he squeezed it back giving her a small smile trying to make her feel better. Amy felt bad as she noticed that he had picked up on her nerves, after all he was the sick one and she should be comforting him. But hospitals always freaked her out a little bit, they had ever since she had been brought in having had an allergic reaction after meeting her uncles dog a few years back. Her experience had been less than stellar, she'd had to stay overnight the nurse had screwed up putting the needle in arm and her doctor had essentially called her stupid for being around dogs, despite not knowing she was allergic to them. On the way over Jake had talked about his doctor to Amy and based on the way he described him, it seemed that Jake was probably in better hands than she was. 

Camilla and her family had been very lucky In the sense that they really didn't know anyone that had had cancer. Sure there was the occasional relative of a family friend but before Jake, no one close to them had been effected and while she was grateful for that learning all of this first hand while taking care of a child was going to be rough. Fortunately for her Karen had met with her to explain everything that was going to go down and what to expect while she was there, while it didn't seem too bad Camilla knew that she had long day ahead of her. As Jake got himself comfortable on the recliner in the center of the room, she and Amy took their seats next to his chair. Amy moved hers a little closer so she could talk to Jake better. Camilla stayed where she was giving the kids space while she grabbed a notepad out of her purse, she had brought with her partially because she had written the information Karen told her in it and also so she could write down any information nurses told her. She didn't know how frequently she was going to be taking Jake to these treatments so she wanted to be prepared for anything that could come up. She had barely registered as nurses came in and checked his vitals and made sure everything was okay, it seemed Jake had barley seemed to notice either as he hadn't stopped whatever conversation he was having with her daughter. She did however notice when a large man came in, he was wearing some fun scrubs and white coat. Camilla assumed that this must be Jake's doctor. 

"Hi I'm Doctor Jeffords, but you can call me Terry. I'm Jake's doctor, you must Camilla Santiago. Karen told me that you would be taking him to some appointments." He explained, offering his hand for her to shake. 

"Yes, I'm not sure how much you know and it's not my place to say what's going on, but let's just say that the Peralta's are having a little bit of a rough time right now and the cancer isn't exactly helping it. Me and my husband offered to look after Jake when Karen couldn't take him to treatments, he's my daughter's best friend and we'd do anything to help him." 

"That's very kind of you. I'm going to give you a quick rundown of what we're going to do today. First I'm going to access his port and drain it of any waste, that should only take a few minutes. Then he receives two phases of chemo, the first is what we call an induction phase. It's a few different kinds of chemo to get his system ready for the second phase which consists of much more toxic and much higher doses of drugs. You should expect him to be tired and lethargic for most of the day, even once he gets off of treatment, he'll probably also be nauseous, and if it's anything like last time he's going to get very clingy/cuddly by the end of the day. By the time all his stuff is done we should have you out of here by 4, 5 at the latest. I believe that covers everything, I know that was a lot to take in so do you have in questions?" 

"Luckily I was able together with Karen yesterday and she gave me an overview of what to expect and do with him, so I'd like to think I'm slightly prepared. Is there anything else I should know before we start?" 

"Nope. I guess I'll get started with the little man." Terry smiled and headed over to where Jake was sitting on the recliner. "Hey buddy how's it going? Who's this?" He asked gesturing to the girl who appeared to be about his age, sitting next to his bed. 

"Hi Terry! This is Amy, she's my best friend and my neighbor!" Jake exclaimed

"Well Amy it's very nice to meet you, I'm Terry and I'm going to be taking very good care of your friend here." He explained to the young girl, who gave him a small smile. He turned his attention back to Jake, who had started wringing his hands nervously. Terry remembered this from the last time, and figured it was a nervous tick of his.

"Hey Jake, everything's going to be fine. We're going to do this one step at a time and we're going to get you through this." Anyone who saw him could read the terror all over Jake's face, Terry couldn't blame him though, he was a young kid who probably didn't have too good of an idea of what was going on. "Alright, first we're going to drain your port and make sure that there's no waste in there. So I need you to take your shirt off for me." Terry tried to explain everything he was doing to the kids, it usually went more smoothly if they knew what to expect. 

"Mrs. Santiago, I know you're not my mom, but could I hold your hand?" Jake asked softly, as Terry started to rub an cream on his chest. It was supposed to make the needle hurt less when it went in, Jake thought it could work better but was grateful that it took some of the pain away. 

"Of course Jake." Camilla said getting up and standing next to his recliner, grabbing Jake's hand in hers, her free hand going to the top of his head as she softly ran her fingers through it as she tried to give him some kind of comfort.

"Alright I'm going to count to 3 and then I'm going to put the needle in. Just like last time. Alright 1…2…3." Terry tried be as gentle as he could as he pushed the syringe into Jake's chest, noting a groan from him and a gasp from the girl sitting next to his best bed. "You're doing so good buddy, I'm almost done with this and then we have one prick and you're all done!" Once the syringe was filled with the waste, he took another needle from the tray beside him and started setting up a line for him so that way when he changed the chemo bags later he wouldn't have to prick Jake again. As he heard Jake breathing deeply through the pain he was feeling, he silently cursed his supervisor Wuntch for not giving him a central line which would require much less pricking of a child who was clearly very afraid of needles. 

"You did such a good job with that Jake, now we just have to put in the line and you'll be all done. You're being so brave and I need you to be brave for just a little bit longer okay. I'm going to do the same thing I just did, count to 3 and then give you the needle. Ready 1…2…3" The line usually took slightly longer to get in and have everything set up and was slightly more painful than just having your port drained, Terry hated seeing kids so upset, despite it being a common occurrence in his line of work. 

"Oww. Oww. Oww" Jake exclaimed as Terry put his line in, he knew that he probably should not be squeezing Mrs. Santiago's hand as hard as he was but he didn't care right as he was in a lot of pain and just wanted it to be over. 

"You're doing such a good job, you are so brave Jake." Camilla comforted as she heard him start crying, as she continued to card her hands through his hair and let him squeeze her hand to try to help him get through the pain. 

"Ok Jake everything's all set up, no more pricks today. You can put your shirt back on, but be careful and try not to hit your line. You did such a good job, I bet your mom would be so proud if she were here right now." Terry congratulated as he put a piece of clear plastic tape over the child's port that way the line couldn't become dislodged if he moved to aggressively. Once Jake got his shirt back on he leaned back against his chair and made himself more comfortable as he got the TV remote. 

"The worst of what he's going to feel pain wise is over. I'll be back in a few hours to change out his bags and I'll check in periodically throughout the day to see how he's doing. If anything seems off or if something bad happens, there's a nurse call button on the wall behind his recliner and if you need to reach me or have any questions here's my number. I don't know how much you are going to be taking of Jake while he goes through treatment, I want you to be as prepared as you can be. Taking care of a child is physically and emotionally draining for both them and you, Jake is very lucky to have you guys to help him through this. I know you're not family, but you mean a lot to him. The last time he was here he spent half the time talking to me about how excited he was to get out of the hospital and go play with your daughter. Your being there for him is going to really help him get through this, especially with his dad leaving. So good luck, and like I said let me know if you need anything." And with that Terry left the room to go check on his other kids. 

"Ames, come sit up here with me so you watch TV better!" Jake requested, moving himself over slightly and patting to a spot next to him.

"Jake I'm not sure, what if I hurt you?" Amy replied back nervously, despite there being a lot of room on the chair she was nervous about hurting him. He did have a needle stuck in his chest after all. 

"It's fine Ames, my mom sat on it with me last time and she's way bigger then you. I'll be fine." 

"Are you sure?" As Jake nodded, Amy glanced back at her mom looking for a second source of approval. After getting a smile and a nod from her mother, Amy left the chair next to Jake's bed and sat down next to him on the recliner. The two of them argued for a few moments about what to watch before settling on Back To the Future, Jake had loved the movie ever since his Dad had shown it to him, it wasn't better than Die Hard, but it was still a good movie. Amy on the other hand had never seen it and Jake declared that they watch that, Jake claimed that it was one of the best movies ever made despite it being really old and Amy needed to learn how great it was. Amy protested originally, but conceded after a few moments remembering that Jake is in the hospital and that she would be nice and try to do as he asked and keep him happy. She rested her head down on the crock of his neck as he made himself more comfortable for the viewing experience. About halfway through the movie Jake could feel the side effects of his treatment start to hit him as he was growing more and more tired and knew that he was going to be in for a rough rest of the day. 

"Mrs. Santiago, can you see if there's a blanket in the room somewhere. I'm really cold." Jake mumbled, he was half asleep and was so desperately trying to stop shivering. He leaned into Amy more, hoping to pick up some of her body heat. Much to his dismay she didn't emit much, probably because she was so cold all the time he thought. 

"Sure Jake." Camilla got up from her chair that was next to Jake's bed and looked in the closet that was at the other end of the very small room they were in. After picking through some medical supplies, she couldn't find one. So she decided to head to the nurses station that they had passed on the way, she told Jake and Amy were she was going and told them to stay put and that she would be right back. Once she got herself oriented, Camilla quickly found the nurses station and was able to get two blankets, one for Jake to use and back up in case something happened to the one he was using. When she got back to the room she noticed how ferociously he was shivering, so she made quick work of getting him wrapped up in the blanket as he finally drifted off to sleep. As Jake drifted off to sleep, Amy went to move off his recliner to give him room to sleep but stopped when she felt his hand wrap around his wrist and stop her. 

"Stay." He mumbled, moving closer to her. Amy stopped and resituated herself back on the recliner as Jake made himself more comfortable. This was not a side of Jake that Amy was used to seeing. 95% of the time Jake was confident and always making jokes or comments about things, to see him so sick and needy. In the few months that she had known Jake she wasn't sure if she had ever seen him like this, sure there were the tears when his dad left and occasionally he'd be more quiet at school after his parents had a really big fight. After a sitting in a comfortable silence with her mother, Amy noticed Jake's doctor walk in. 

"Hi, I'm back and I just came to check on Jake and move him to his second chemo phase." Terry walked into the room quietly, trying not to wake Jake if he was asleep. As he checked the machines next to the recliner, Jake started to wake up. "Hey buddy, I just came into check on you and give you some more medicine." He reiterated. 

"Hey Terry. Do you need my line?" Jake asked, if he remembered correctly from last time when he changed medicines half way through Terry used his line.

"I do, good job remembering Jake!" 

"Is it going to hurt like it did earlier?"

"No, we already but the needle in your chest so I just need to attach the new medicine bag to your line and take out the old one. No needles." 

"Promise?" 

"Promise." 

"Alright, I believe you but I'm going to throw up all over your coat later if your lying to me." 

"Sure Jake, if it hurts like it did before you can throw up on me. I'm only agreeing to this because I know that it isn't. Last time you were here you slept through this part. Now let me see your line and you can get back to sleeping." Jake grabbed the medical tube that ran underneath his shirt and handed it to Terry who made quick work of switching out his medication. "You're all good Jake, did it hurt?" 

"No, you were right." Jake sighed, pretending to be annoyed when he was secretly grateful that it hadn't been anything like it was before. 

"I'm your doctor of course I'm right, I'll see you once this phase is done. Rest up and be good, I don't want to hear any complaints from nurses about you." 

"Don't worry, Amy here will make sure I won't get in any trouble. She's the reason I haven't had to go to the principal's office at all this year." 

"Well alright then, I guess you're in good hands then. I'll see you in a little bit buddy." 

"Would you two like to go down to the cafeteria and get some lunch?" Camilla asked once Jake's doctor had left. 

"Wait! I'm allowed to leave this hospital room?" Jake exclaimed, last time he was here his mom had practically confined him to his bed for the duration of his stay. 

"One of your nurses told me that you were allowed to leave when we first got here. I think it'll be a good change of scenery for a little bit."

"You don't need to ask me twice, I'm so bored just sitting here." 

Thus began the journey of getting Jake down to the cafeteria for lunch, Camilla made sure that his blanket was wrapped tightly around him and that he was comfortable with his pole that was carrying his medication. Slowly Jake pushed himself off the recliner his hand grabbing on his IV pole to keep him stable. Karen had let Camilla know that when Jake was on or had just received chemo his mobility decreased, she wasn't sure if it was due to him being lethargic or the medication he was on but that someone needed to keep an eye on him as he walked to make sure he didn't trip and fall, so Camilla kept one hand on Jake's back making sure that he was staying up his friend also gripping onto Amy's for support. As they moved out of the pediatric oncology wing and down toward the cafeteria the trio earned sad smiles from most people that saw him, most of it was clearly directed at Jake who was very clearly ill, but she could tell that some were directed at her. Most people probably assumed that he was her son and felt sorry that she was in the situation. In reality though Karen deserved all the praise and condolences, it was her son whose life was on the line. Sure if something bad happened to Jake the family would be crushed, but she would get to go home and see all seven of her kids grow up and Karen would not. Camilla snapped out these mildly morbid thoughts when she heard her daughter and him laughing, it was a reminder that he was still here and that everything was okay so far. Eventually the made it down to the cafeteria and found an open table, the walk down had taken a lot out Jake who as soon as he sat down laid his head on the table and complained about how tired he was. 

"Why does the cafeteria have to be so far away from my room?" Jake groaned, as he wrapped his blanket around himself tighter.

"I'm not sure mijo, what would you like for lunch?" 

"Just chicken noddle soup, I'm kind of cold and soup generally doesn't make me feel like I'm going to throw up." 

"Alright, I'll be back with the food in a minute. Stay where you are and don't wonder around, Amy come get me something happens."

Once Camilla was out of earshot Jake turned to ask Amy about the word mijo, he had hear Mrs. Santiago call him that while taking care of him and he'd also heard her use it with her sons. He knew it was Spanish and was curious as to what it meant, he figured it wasn't bad if it was something she'd use with her sons. 

"Hey Ames, what does mijo mean, I hear your mom keep calling me it." 

"It means son, but generally she uses it when she's talking to anyone that's a kid that's a boy." Amy explained, Jake felt his heart swell a little bit hearing that Mrs. Santiago thought of him as a son. Despite the Santiago's welcoming him with open arms, they terrified him. They were two people that very much valued cleanliness, order and generally the opposite of his personality. 

"So, is there a word for daughter then?" 

"Yeah, mija. You've probably heard my mom call me that a thousand times. Do you have any words for stuff like that in Hebrew?"

"Ben and Bat, but usually they're written as little symbols. That's all Hebrew is, symbols. It was really confusing to learn actually." Jake recounted all the struggles he'd had in Sunday school trying to learn the language that everyone else seemed to pick up so easily. 

"Sounds like it, how do you know how to say the words if it's just a symbol." Amy asked, trying to picture a language that didn't have any letters. 

"Usually teachers show us the symbols and next to it are ways to pronounce it. I think the only reason I picked some of it up is because my nana speaks it around the house all the time."

"That's how I learned Spanish, because my parents talk in it all the time when we're at home. They say it reminds them of Cuba." 

"That's cool, both of my parents are from New York and neither of them really talk in Hebrew. My dad's not even Jewish, just my mom." 

"Both of my parents are Catholic, my mom always jokes that my abuela would have killed her if she married someone that wasn't catholic. Though I don't think there are anything other than Catholics in Cuba, at least it seems that way from how my parents talk about it." 

"Alright, I've got lunch. Some chicken noodle soup and orange soda for you Jake, and I got you a sandwich and some water for you Amy." The trio feel into a comfortable rhythm of talking and silence and as they ate lunch, by the end of it Camilla and Amy seemed to be doing as most of the talking as Jake had grown quiet. As Camilla cleared away there plate and bowls she noticed Jake starting to nod off. 

"Jake do you think you can walk back to the room, or do you need help?" Camilla asked noticing that Jake had becoming increasingly tired and would maybe fall asleep right then and there if she'd let him. 

"Need help." Jake wasn't proud of needing help, but he knew that if he tried to walk back up to his room it wouldn't end well and he was tired. So tired. And with Mrs. Santiago picked him up out of his chair, he didn't realize how close he was to falling asleep until he was in her arms and was fighting to stay awake. 

"Are you comfortable, is your line okay?" Camilla asked, her biggest concern was that she'd hit one of his wires and he'd end up in pain. 

"I'm good." He mumbled, resting his head in the crock of her neck. If Camilla thought that she had gotten sad stares from people on the way down, nothing rivaled the whispers and sad glances getting shot her way as she brought Jake back up to his room. Because Jake had walked down to the cafeteria she figured that people that he was healthy to some degree, her certainly didn't real look the part of a cancer patient yet. But in the short hour that they had eaten lunch Jake had grown significantly paler and was dead asleep in her arms, to the average on looker he looked much sicker now than he did on his way down. They made it up to the room, without any issues and she got Jake situated back on his recliner without walking him up.

"I'm gonna be sick." Jake slurred out, as he felt his stomach twist into knot. 

Camilla rushed into action hearing that Jake thought he was going to throw up, she quickly located the bucket that was sitting on the shelf across from his recliner and got it to him just before he threw up. She held the bucket underneath his chin and rubbed up and down his back to try and hopefully comfort him. Eventually the wave passed and Jake tried to go back to sleep and stay that way for the remainder of his treatment, but that proved to be difficult as he was so cold despite being in his warmest sweatshirt and sweatpants and having a blanket wrapped tightly around him. 

"Jake, are you okay?" Amy asked, noticing how ferociously shivering her best friend was.

"Yeah, I'm just really cold." He mumbled, furrowing deeper under the blanket to warm up. 

"Can I do anything to help?" 

"Come sit with me." The request confused Amy, but she got up on the recliner and almost immediately he wrapped his arms around her laying into her side. Once she got over the initial shock of him wrapping his arms around her, she realized that he was trying to get himself warmer. When Camilla got back from the bathroom, she noticed Jake curled into her daughter's side, shaking. At first she thought he might have been crying but then saw that he was asleep, she realized that he was cold. She quickly made work of finding the second blanket she had gotten from the nurses station and wrapping it around him, hoping he would stop shivering. 

Fortunately they made it through the rest of treatment without any major issues. Jake for the most slept for the remainder of the time he was there, only slightly waking up when Terry came in and disconnected him from his chemo. Jake was clearly in no condition to walk out to the car so Camilla carried him in her arms, her daughter holding her free hand. The car ride back to Jake's house was relatively uneventful, expect for the small scare that Jake thought he was going to throw up in the back of the Santiago's van, Camilla was able to pull over him and get him out of the car before that happened. Once he got home, it was smooth sailing he laid on the couch with Amy watching Ninja Turtle movies and trying to not to throw up while he waited for his mom to get home. Today wasn't great, any day when Jake was in the hospital wasn't great, but Jake knew that if every day was like today then they'd get through it fine. Between his mom, the Santiago's and some of his other friends Jake felt loved and he knew that as long he kept feeling loved he'd be able to get through anything.


	3. Chapter 3

Jake had finally felt normal for the first time since being diagnosed a two weeks ago. He had finally been able to return to school as long as he didn't have treatment that day, if he had treatment either the Santiago's would take him or his mom if she was able to get off. He was grateful that for the most part people weren't treating him differently from before he was diagnosed. Sure his mom sometimes didn't yell at him over stupid things and some people were just a little bit nicer to him, but for the most part everything had stayed relatively the same. Despite feeling sick after he'd had chemo, Jake felt relatively fine for the most part, sure he'd dropped some weight and he was a little more tired than usual but for the most part he still maintained his upbeat and hyperactive personality. He didn't look sick either, he looked like your average 8 year old, not one that was battling cancer. He knew he was going to lose his hair at some point, but he pushed it out of his mind until it actually happened. 

It was a Saturday when Jake first realized that his hair was starting to fall out, he noticed some hair on his pillow when he got out of bed that morning. He hadn't thought much of it at first, until he felt a thinning patch of hair on the back of his head. He swallowed back some tears and started to get ready for the day, he didn't have to go to the hospital so maybe he would go hang out with Amy or do something fun. He quickly but carefully got dressed, trying to make sure nothing got caught on the medical tape that sat over a large portion of his chest, it had happened one time before resulting in a minor meltdown and he'd almost had to go to the ER because he mom thought he pulled too much skin up. He brushed his teeth and started combing his hair, he was thinking about Die Hard when he noticed little strands of hair that had gathered on his shirts shoulders. It was in that moment that he knew that is hair was falling out and it was going to happen rather soon and rather quickly based on the amount of hair that was coming off his head anytime something touched it. He ate breakfast with his mom in a comfortable silence, he was thinking and his mom couldn't function until she'd gotten through a cup of coffee first. Jake decided that he was going to take matters into his own hands, he was going to shave his head. He knew his dad had left a razor and he'd do it this afternoon, but he needed to help. Normally he'd call Gina first because fashion was her expertise, but she was out of town at some dance thing so he decided that Amy was his next best option. Afterall she had been with him almost every step of the way so far. 

"Hey mom, can I invite Amy over this afternoon?" Jake asked, breaking the silence 

"I have work later this afternoon so you're going to go to the Santiago's anyway, but sure you can invite her over earlier to hangout it you want." 

"Alright cool, I'm gonna go call her." He excused himself from the table, and went into the next room to go call her. 

"Hey Ames, can you come over in a little bit. There's something really important we need to do." Jake explained into the phone. Amy's end was silent for a moment, he knew that she'd left to go check with her mom and see if it was okay. 

"Yeah, I can come. What' so important that we need to do." She was curious as to what was so important that she needed to go to her best friends, when he was going to coming over hers later that same afternoon. 

"I'll explain when you get here. It's nothing bad I promise. I'll see you in a little bit." He replied hanging up the phone, he went upstairs and grabbed his dads razor and put it in his room. He tried to straighten it up before Amy came, Jake wasn’t a neat person by nature, and having cancer wasn't really helping that as there was a bucket sitting on a ledge somewhere and blankets and sweatshirts were all over the floor as he would take them on off depending on if he were hot or cold. Within the hour he heard his doorbell ring, he knew it was Amy. He ran downstairs to answer the door before his Mom did and had the chance to ask any questions, even if Amy didn't know what was going on she knew it was something important and he didn't want his mom stopping him. 

"Hey Jake." Amy greeted as she stepped inside the Peralta residence, which was slowly becoming her second home at this point. 

"Hey Ames, follow me upstairs." She greeted Mrs. Peralta as they passed the kitchen and went upstairs to Jake's room, he was practically dragging her up the stairs. Whatever he had plans to do was very important to him. 

"Alright Jake, what is the important thing we need to do?" 

"My hairs falling out and I wanna shave it." 

"Ohh Jake I'm so sorry, but why do I need to be here for this."

"Because you're going to help me do it." He replied, suddenly getting quiet. He wondered if his plan was to rash and that Amy wouldn't want to help him. 

"Let's do it then." She could tell by his facial expressions that this was something he so desperately needed to do, so she agreed despite it being mildly reckless. The two of them marched down the hall and into the bathroom, she had Jake sit on the edge of the bathtub, while she stood behind him. "You ready?" 

"Ready, as I'll every be." Fear was starting to set in and he was starting to maybe second guess his idea, but before he had a chance to voice any of he felt a razor take a piece of hair from the back of his head. "No going back now, I guess." 

Karen should have known that nothing could was going to come of her son and his best friend going into his bathroom together and closing the door behind them. She was upstairs getting ready for work and heard to the two of them doing something, eventually she pined the sound down to her ex-husbands razor that he'd left here. She was confused about what they were doing with it for a minute until she put two and two together, quickly rushing into the bathroom. Despite figuring out what they were up to, nothing could have prepared her for the shock of seeing her son almost completely bald and his best friend standing behind him with her tongue slightly stuck out of her mouth as she shaved his head. 

"Oh Jake." Karen sighed

"My hair started falling out this morning and I wanted to do something about it. Are you mad?" He asked, his eyes not looking up to meet hers. 

"I'm so proud of you." 

"You're not mad?" 

"I'm not mad, I most certainly wasn't expecting it. But I'm not mad, how could I be mad at you for taking control of a situation that is most certainly not in your control. Why don't I finish up." Amy nodded and switched places with Karen handing her the razor, she knew if her son was going to be bald it was going to be a clean shave. And despite Amy doing a surprisingly good job, she was going to finish it up so that way it wouldn't look like a haircut gone bad. As Karen finished shaving off the remaining hair from her son's hair Amy stepped out. She went down the hall to his room in search of hat, her brother had gotten a really short buzz cut once a few years back and was always complaining about how cold his head was. Amy assumed that Jake was going to be the same way. Quickly she found a Mets baseball hat that was on the floor of his room and returned back to the bathroom. 

"Here, I got this from your room." Amy replied breaking the silence, handing him the Mets baseball hat which he gratefully put on. 

Until they had to go back over to the Santiago's, Jake and Amy hung out at his house watching movies and playing around like old times. Once Jake had put his hat on he had taken the loss of his hair surprisingly well and you wouldn't have even guessed that it had been bothering him. His happy mood kept up as they transitioned over to the Santiago household, he was greeted by Amy's parents. After quickly greeting her parents they holed themselves up on the couch and turned on a movie like they always did when he came over. Generally when he was spending time at the Santiago residence Jake was feeling pretty unwell and on the days when he did have the energy to actually play like a normal kid, he knew he couldn't participate in any of the Santiago's crazy games because there was always the potential to get hurt and his mom would kill him if he got hurt. They stayed on the couch half watching the movie, half discussing typical childhood things like school, tv shows movies and music. Jake and Amy had had a smooth relationship since they met a few months earlier, despite what was going on their conversation was always easy and filled with playful arguments and banter. Jake was grateful that their relationship hadn't changed much after he was diagnosed, finding that most people treated him as if he were going to break if the hit him too hard. Amy on the other hand still continued to fight with him over stupid things and correct his grammar when necessary, she was truly his best friend and he couldn't be more grateful to have her.


	4. Chapter 4

When Jake walked into school on Monday he expected everything to be as it had been before he ended up in a long term hospital stay due to some problems with his medication. However it wasn't, when he got to school and put his backpack on a hook he noticed a boy sitting in his seat, one that wasn't there the week before. 

"Hey excuse me you're sitting in my seat." Jake said, walking over and tapping the new kid in the back. 

"No, I'm not. This has been my seat since I got here last week." The boy replied, breaking his conversation with Amy. 

"It's my seat dude. I've sat there all year, I just missed last week cause I was in the hospital."

"Well I don't believe you. Tell him it's my seat Amy!" 

"Sorry Teddy, Jake's right." Amy shrugged, she had liked Teddy and all. But nothing could compare to sitting next to Jake, he always made class fun and interesting. 

"Wow, you're really taking his side. I heard that his dad left because of him and he's bald." 

"I'm standing right here you know." Jake mumbled under his breath, his hand clenching tighter around the desk that he was using to help keep himself standing upright. 

"What seems to be the problem over here?" Kevin Cozner asked, a smile slightly creeping on his face when he noticed that Jake Peralta had finally returned back to school. 

"This kid Teddy's sitting in my seat and he won't give it back." Jake pouted 

"Teddy I'm afraid Jake's right, this seating was only temporary until he came back. You're going to move to another table." 

"But…" 

"No buts young man. Now go sit at table 4." He said gesturing to table on the other side of the room. "Welcome back Jake. I assume everything is better now that you're out of the hospital"

"Yeah I got a fever after chemo and that means I have to stay at the hospital for 2 nights, then once those 2 nights were up I had to get chemo again. I just really didn't feel good." Jake explained, sitting down at his desk. 

"Well I'm glad to hear that, let me know if you need anything." 

As the morning dragged on Jake could not be happier to be back at school, despite all his learning struggles he loved not being in the hospital hooked up to a bunch of machines feeling generally unwell. Amy and Gina spent most of the morning trying help him get up to date with what they had learned over the past week, Jake noticed that his workload was probably much lighter then what it would have been if wasn't so sick but he didn't mind though. He found that it was easier to learn the information in the smaller quantities that Mr. Kevin had provided him with then the actual amount of workload the class had gone through. His favorite part of the day came when they were released for recess right before lunch, despite Jake not being able to do much as he treatments continued it was nice for him to go outside and spend some time not learning and just be a normal kid. 

Now Jake was not someone who had experienced much bullying in his lifetime, he generally chalked it up to him having the same interest as everyone else his age and Gina being so close to him. Despite Gina being an oddball most people were afraid of her in one way or another and most people left Jake alone because of his association with her. However there was one person in the school that essentially bothered everyone, that was Keith Pembroke, other kids called him the Vulture. He made fun of anyone and everyone, he came from a well off family and believed that he was entitled to things that the other kids, whether he actually needed them or not. Jake and his friends were no exception to this, Amy was short, nerdy and a Latina, Gina was just straight up out there and Jake was fidgety, loud and at this point had driven away his father and was incredibly sick. 

"Well, well, well look what the cat dragged in." Keith said, approaching the bench where the three friends where sitting. Because Jake couldn't do much the trio had spent most of their recess either sitting on a bench talking or swinging on the swings. 

"Go away Vulture, no one wants to see you." Jake moaned 

"So Peralta I head your Dad left because of you." This was a sore spot for Jake and he immediately stiffened upon hearing the Vulture bring up what he secretly feared. Amy must have sensed this because her hand was immediately on his shoulder, giving it a light squeeze to bring him back to reality before he was too far gone in his head. 

"What did you just say?" Gina asked standing up, if there was one thing she had more than drab clothing was someone offending someone who was basically her brother.

"I said his Dad left because he's freak. After all who would want a kid that's too loud, can't sit still and oh yeah did I forget is bald." 

"Take that back!" Jake yelled, shaking a little as he pulled himself to his feet. 

"Did you just threaten me?" 

"I said take it back!" 

"You know Peralta I don't appreciate being threatened, especially by puny little no ones like you." Jake was completely shaking out of pure rage and anger, it was taking everything within in him not to punch the Vulture right then and there. 

"Dude no one likes you and you're mean to everyone. If you're not going to take back what you said about my dad then leave me and my friends alone." 

In that moment something snapped within the vulture, Jake wasn't sure if it was Jake telling him that no one liked him or the fact that someone had finally called him out for being mean to other kids. But one moment he was standing across from Jake a smirk on his face, the next Jake was on the ground and the vulture was punching any part of his body he could get a hand on. Gina and Amy stood there for a minute in shock before realizing the situation at hand and trying to pull the Vulture off of Jake before he got seriously injured if he wasn't already. It took a few tries but the pair eventually got the larger boy of Jake. Amy could hear Gina off in the distance giving the Vulture a piece of her mind while she checked and made sure Jake was already. 

"Hey Ames, I think I need to go to the nurse." Jake moaned, feeling pain coming for several different points in his body. 

"I would agree. Here let me help you stand up." She gave Jake both her hands as he grasped them firmly as she helped pull him into a standing position. He leaned heavily on her as she helped navigate him to the nurses office.

"Oh my, what happened to him." Sharron Jeffords asked as Amy Santiago pulled in Jake Peralta who was covered in blood and bruises. 

"The stupid vulture beat me up." Jake groaned as he got himself comfortable on one of the beds in the nurses office. 

"The vulture?" 

"Keith Pembroke." Amy explained, knowing that most of the adults in the school weren't aware of the nickname all the kids had for him. 

"Well I'm sorry to hear that. Let's get you all cleaned up and make sure that you're okay." Fortunately most of the wounds were superficial and that why yes Jake would probably be quite sore these next few days he had sustained mostly bruises and a few cuts. 

"Well Mr. Peralta you appear to be quite lucky, you've got mostly bruises and cuts. Nothing that shouldn't clear themselves up in a few days. Jake smiled finally opening his eyes a little, now knowing that he was okay and felt his pain diminish slightly. 

"Hey, my doctor's last name is Jeffords." Jake smiled as he told the nurse his fact. 

"Well my husband is doctor and I'm guessing he's yours." She smiled, her husband had come home with an abundance of stories about a young boy named Jake Peralta who had an abundance of energy who was typically brought to the hospital for treatment by family friends as he mother worked two jobs and his father had left the day after he was diagnosed. She knew that the same boy her husband talked about was the boy sitting in front of her right now. 

"You're married to Terry, he's like the best person in the hospital." Sharron smiled at that, she knew her husband tried so hard to make the lives of the kids he treated better and take make their stays enjoyable. She knew he'd be happy to hear that his efforts were successful, even if it was with one child.

"Ahh Jake I see you made it to the nurse after the incident with Mr. Pembroke. I'm going to have a talk with everyone that was involved including so make your way into my office and get yourself comfortable. Mrs. Santiago I would like you to join him." Raymond Holt was the principle of PS 99, one of the better public schools in Brooklyn. He was strict and some said that he was emotionless but he genuinely cared for all of the students here. He had no tolerance for fighting and bullying as a gay man he had faced enough of it to know how hurtful it could be and made sure that it didn't happen in his school. Keith Pembroke had come into his office saying that Jake Peralta punched him in the gut for no reason, Keith was sitting in his office right now waiting for Raymond to talk to him. Holt had gotten word that Jake was in the nurse and had come to inform the young man that he would need to hear his side of the story as well, upon seeing Jake though Holt had some doubts that Keith was true. Afterall Jake was the one laying down in the nurse with an icepack over and bruises starting to form while Keith looked generally untouched. 

Jake sighed as he got up and made his way into the principal's office, he knew that he was going to get in trouble instead of the Vulture. Somehow anytime a kid accused the Vulture of doing something bad to them, the Vulture would get off while the kid who told got in trouble. To be fair Principal McGinley wasn't really much of a principal and generally didn't punish anyone. Despite this though it seemed like Jake's luck that he'd be the one to get in trouble, after all who would believe the kid that drove away his own father. As Jake slumped down in a chair in the office he noticed that Gina was sitting in there as well, she explained that because she had seen the whole thing that Holt wanted to talk to her as well. Jake got himself comfortable, leaning his head on Amy's shoulder as he felt exhaustion start to take over. The pills that he took in the morning that got him to lunch were starting to wear off, coupled with the fact that he'd just been beaten up Jake thought that he was going to fall asleep. Amy and Gina went in before him, Amy just about had a heart attack before going in, she had never been in trouble before in her life. Jake laughed and explained to her that she wasn't actually in trouble and that Holt just wanted to know what she saw. 

"Jake, come on in." Holt said poking his head out of his office door once he finished with Amy. He noted the way the young man pulled himself out of his chair and slowly and unsteadily made his way into his office. It was quite evident that the Jake had some mobility issues and was gravely ill. "So Jake why don't you tell me what happened." 

"So Amy, Gina and I were sitting on a bench at recess, my medicine makes me sick and makes me have trouble walking and stuff, so we can't really do anything other than swing and sit on a bench. So we were sitting there and talking when Keith came up to us and started making fun of us, like he does with every other kid in the school. Today's was about how my dad left because of me and because I was weird." Jake explained, growing quiet at the last part. "It made me really mad so I told him to take it back and he wouldn't, so I told him that he nobody likes him and to leave me and my friends alone. After I said that he started punching me and it hurt, a lot." 

"I'm sorry to hear that. Now Keith did this out of the blue, you and your friends didn't say or do anything to him." Holt knew that Pembroke had instigated the fight, but he had to ask the question anyway. 

"No, I mean other than the me telling him that no one likes him. I know I shouldn't have said that but I was just trying to get him to leave me and my friends alone." Jake sighed. 

"I'm glad to hear that your sorry. Now how are you feeling, I know you just got out of the hospital and that this past month certainly hasn't been easy for you?" 

"I'm alright, I'm glad to not be at the hospital today, although I was afraid for a minute that I was going to have to go back after Keith beat me up. It's been hard on my mom, my dad left and she had to get another job so that way I could get better. I spend a lot of time at the Santiago's house, they take good care of me though when my mom's not there." 

"Well it's good to know that you are being well taken care of and that everything is going okay. Now I noticed as you were sitting in the waiting room you started to fall asleep, do you think you can make it through the rest of the day or would you like to go home?" Holt knew that Jake's health was a priority with his cancer treatment and he was doing his best to accommodate the young boy and his needs. 

"I'd like to go home if you don't mind, I'm really tired and sore. Plus I had chemo two days ago so I'm still not feeling to great. My mom's not going to be home for you to call though, so you're going to have to call Mrs. Santiago, Amy's mom." Jake explained 

"Alright, I'll get on that. Now would you like Amy to go home with you." Once the school had found out that the Santiago's were taking care of Jake a large portion of the time Holt noticed that Amy was always with him, she missed the days he had chemo and according to their teacher, his husband, the two could not be separated. 

"I'd like that." Jake said, a genuine smile creeping up onto his face. Holt smiled and told Jake to get Amy and wait in the nurse while he made the phone call. Camilla Santiago was quite concerned when she got a call saying that Jake had gotten beaten up at school and that he was going to come home. After being assured that Jake was fine and did not need medical attention and that the fight was not his fault she quickly speed over to the school to pick him and her daughter up. She was happy to see that the two of them were sitting in the front office with their backpacks looking like normal eight year old wrapped in some bizarre conversation that only the two of the could have. Jake fell asleep on the way back to their house and Amy sat their wondering if she should bring up what happened to her mom. 

"Jake didn't start the fight, he should have but he didn't." Amy blurted out. 

"I know that." Camilla replied, didn't her daughter realize that the two of them had started it they would have been getting one hell of a lecture

"Jake should have punched him, Keith talked about his cancer and his family." 

"He did what now?" Pure white fury ran through Camilla's veins as she heard that someone made fun of Jake because of things that were very much out of his control. 

"Keith told him that his dad left because he's too loud, he's weird and he's bald. It made Jake really mad and it made me really mad." Amy explained 

"As it should. No one should make fun of anyone, especially in Jake's condition." 

"When we first moved here, Jake used to make the bullies start making fun of him so they'd stop picking on me. He told me that he could handle it because he had friends." Camilla felt a smile grow on her face at hearing that her daughter's best friend had taken the brunt of some bullying to make sure she didn't have to. The Santiago's had moved to Brooklyn from New Jersey mostly because of her husband's job, there move was also partially facilitated by the fact that most of her children had been made fun of at school for having an accent and speaking Spanish. Since starting school in Brooklyn she hadn't heard her kids complain about any type of bullying, it sounded like Amy had experienced some but it had been quickly diverted by the young boy sleeping in the back of her SUV. 

Jake clearly wasn't the perfect child, Camilla watched him enough to know that like everyone else in the world he had flaws. He was loud, he wasn't neat, he curse more than any 8 year old should and like most 8 year old boys he liked to tease people. However, she knew that overall Jake was a good kid with a heart of gold. Over the past month she had seen how he wanted everyone around him to be happy, she saw it the most when it came to his mother. Karen had told her stories of stupid jokes that he told, or stories and games that he'd make up. With his father leaving, Jake had become even more outgoing and exuberant if that was even possible, she knew that he was trying to shut out the pain that he was feeling. Camilla had overheard several conversations over the past month where Jake had expressed to Amy that he viewed his father leaving as his fault, when it most certainly wasn't. Despite all that was going in his life, Jake had still managed to be a normal kid. Camilla noticed that, usually when he was hanging out with her daughter. The two spent most of their time together bickering over stupid things, that could be attributed to their essentially polar opposite personalities, in the end though they balanced each other out. Amy kept Jake on top of his school and made sure he actually did the work he was assigned, and Jake helped Amy let loose and have a little fun. She couldn't help but be grateful for the wide eyed, brown haired, hyperactive boy that lived next store. Jake Peralta had made his impression on the Santiago's, and Camilla knew that it was something that they were never going to lose.


	5. Chapter 5

As Thanksgiving rolled around Jake found that his mom was spending more and more time working, meaning that he was spending more time at the Santiago's. He hated that she was spending so much time working, and he couldn't feel guilty for the dark circles that had started to appear under her eyes, his mom worked about 8 hours as a public school art teacher and then night shifts at a local restaurant. And it didn't help that most of her days off he was at the hospital or at home throwing up. She always waved him off when he asked if she was okay, and if it was his fault that she was so tired, she would calmly explain that none of this was his fault and it was all out of his control. But somehow Jake just couldn't believe that and continued to feel guilty and do everything in his power to try and make her life easier. The Santiago's on the other hand had done a great job of taking care of him, they had gotten used to his crazy rambling stories and general messiness and provided him with almost as much comfort as his mom. Jake was happy and felt that they were like his family, despite not being related to him. 

The day before Thanksgiving Jake was at the hospital with Mr. Santiago and Amy, receiving treatment. He'd been at the hospital every day that week so far getting chemo, so that way he wouldn't have to go in for the rest of Thanksgiving break and would be free to hang out like a normal kid. However having the treatments back to back had left him exhausted and drained and he couldn't wait to go home later that day. He was laying down in his bed trying to fall back asleep after finishing throwing up, when his doctor Terry came in. Despite loving him, Jake just really wanted to be left alone and try and go back to sleep he really wasn't feeling well. 

"Hey Jake, I know you don't feel good so I'm going to make this quick. But I need to talk to you about something." Terry sighed lightly, as he sat down in the chair next to the young boys bed. It had been his idea to give Jake three straight days of chemo so that way he wouldn't have to come in over Thanksgiving weekend, but seeing unwell he was feeling Terry couldn't help but feel guilty for making the young boy feel this way. "So you told me when you came in on Monday that sometimes it's hard to walk, even when you're not at the hospital." 

"Yeah, what about that." Jake asked confused, slowly rolling over to face his doctor. 

"Well we were thinking of giving you crutches or something like that, to help make walking easier." Terry explained. 

"What about a cane?" 

"A cane?" Terry asked incredulously, Jake Peralta was certainly full of surprises 

"Yeah, John McClane wouldn't use crutches, he'd use a cane." Jake explained, pulling his blanket tighter around him. 

"Alright I'll see what I can do in the cane department." The doctor chuckled, patting the young man on the shoulder before heading out. So that's the story of how an 8 year old Jake Peralta left the hospital with what he considered to be a badass cane. Much to Jake's surprise the cane did actually help him walk around, usually he was sore and exhausted after treatments so he had to heavily lean on someone or get carried. With the cane he was able to walk out, albeit at a fraction of his usual pace, but he could do it all on his own. 

With Roger having recently left, and Karen not having a lot of family in the area, the Peralta's had been invited to the Santiago's house for Thanksgiving. Jake was always happy to go over to the Santiago's house, despite the fact that he practically lived there and Karen was thrilled that she wasn't going to be spending Thanksgiving alone with her chronically ill son, despite the fact that she was going to have to leave early to work a shift. The two were barely scrapping by as it was between mortgage payments and Jake's medical bills, Karen never let Jake now that money was tight. She could already tell that he worried about her enough as it is and she didn't need to give him any more reason to. Afterall he was only 8 years old, this was adult stuff that he didn't need to be dealing with. 

"Alright Jake, go upstairs and get dressed. We need to leave for the Santiago's soon." Karen called out to her son who was laying on the couch watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. Despite living only next store to the Santiago's, Karen knew that getting Jake dressed and out the door on time would be a challenge. Before the cancer Jake was already pretty spacey, and had the tendency to get side tracked, over the course of the past month she'd noticed it somehow had gotten worse. She knew that part of it was him procrastinating, he had gotten very self-conscious about what he looked like since he shaved his head. He didn't like being sick, and he certainly didn't like looking like a sick kid either. It had been a lot all at once and she understood that it was a lot for him to handle and she did her best to help him through it, despite working crazy hours and not being home half the time. 

"Hey Mom, I need help." Jake called from his room, he was having trouble with the buttons on his flannel shirt that his mom had picked out for him to wear yesterday. He sat down on the edge of his bed as his mom came in, and helped him out with his shirt. 

"And you're sure you're feeling okay? The Santiago's will understand if you don't feel well enough to go, you did just have treatment yesterday." Jake's reactions to his chemotherapy had not been the best, he already endured the typical sickness that people normally felt the night after chemo, but more often than not his side effects would drift into the next few days. Leaving him in a miserable, sluggish state. 

"I'm fine mom, you've asked me this like 100 times today." Jake groaned, he knew that she meant well, but his mom had gotten really protective of him the last month and sometimes it got on his nerves. He wanted to be treated like how he was before he was diagnosed. As his mom finished helping, he grabbed onto her wrists and pulled himself of his bed. Even with the cane, standing up was still something that he found to be difficult. Jake stood in front of his mirror as he placed on one of the many beanies he had collected over the course of his treatment so far, he had built up a pretty decent collection in a short amount of time. Most had been gifts from people after he shaved his head, they all felt bad for him and this was there way of helping. At least that's what his mom told him. 

"What if the Santiago's relatives don't like me?" Jake blurted out after a moment of silence. When he found out that Amy's grandparents were coming to Thanksgiving dinner Jake had immediately panicked. He knew that many people found him to be annoying and "a lot", and he was terrified that Amy's relatives were going to hate him. 

"Jake, Amy's grandparents are not going to hate you. I promise." 

"But I'm bald…and I can't sit still….I'm too loud…."Jake rambled, listing off every negative trait a person had told him he had over the years. To see Jake in such distress upset Karen greatly, she hated that so many people had pointed out his flaws. She understood that Jake could be a lot, he was loud and hyperactive, and he could barely focus on a single task without his mind racing to another one halfway. However, she knew that if people would look behind that they would find that her son had a heart of gold, he cared so deeply for the people around him and he loved to make other people happy, especially those who were feeling sad. 

"Yes Jake you are all those things, but that's what makes you you. You are also a very kind, caring, and funny kid Jake, I'm sure they'll see that. In fact I wouldn't want anyone else to be son, you're perfect just the way you are and you shouldn't let anyone tell you differently." A smile final crept onto his face at his mom's words, sure he was an 3rd grader now and he probably shouldn't need his mom to reassure him of all this but he was going through a lot right and now and he figured that it was okay. "Alright so are you ready to go? We're already running a little late as it is." Jake nodded his head, as his mom picked him up off his bed. Despite his protests that he could in fact walk to the Santiago's house, his mother persisted pointing out the fact that he had had hard a time walking around there living room this morning and that she didn't want him to trip and fall on the concrete and result in a trip to the ER. Upon reaching the Santiago's he had convinced his mom to put him down, he told her that he could walk in the house just fine and he promised that he wouldn't fall trying to go in. 

Camilla felt a smile creep onto her face when she opened the door to see Karen and Jake. Jake looked surprisingly well for a child who had just spent three days receiving highly toxic medication, Karen on the other hand did not look so well. The dark circles under her eyes had become even more pronounced and there were varying degrees of stress lines on her face due to the events of the past month. "Well don't just stand there come on in." 

"Thank you so much for having us for Thanksgiving, this past month as been a lot and I'd hate for Jake to have to spend today alone." 

"Ohh it's no problem, Jake Amy's in the living room with some of the boys if you want to go join them." Camilla said turning to the 8 year old, who smiled happily and slowly made his way into the next room. "Now why don't I get you a drink and you can make yourself comfortable." 

"Thank you, lord knows I need one after the month I've been having." 

"So how's Jake been, I know Victor said that when he sat with him yesterday that he didn't look too good." 

"For a kid with cancer not too bad, I would definitely say that he didn't react too well to having chemo several days in a row. He was up half of last night throwing up, I'm honestly amazed that he felt okay enough to come this afternoon. Although I think it may have something todo with your daughter." 

"The two of them are closer then most kids their ages, although I can't tell if their relationship is more like brother and sister or if one of them has a crush on the other."

"They're still kids, they have plenty of time to deal with what ever their relationship is going to turn into. Right now I'm just glad that Jake has Amy, and all of your kids for that matter. I think it's made this process a lot easier for him, knowing that there are people out there who aren't going to treat him differently know that he's sick." 

Meanwhile in the next room 

"Jake you made it!" Amy squealed, as her best friend made his way over to the couch where she was sitting. "Mama said you might not come because of how sick you were yesterday."

"I wouldn't miss Thanksgiving Ames, it's a day dedicated to free food why would I pass up that opportunity. Plus I would have to come to your house tonight anyway because my mom has work." 

"Well I'm still happy, you did not look good yesterday. Gina would have been horrified if she'd seen you, she would have definitely tried to put makeup on you to make you look better." 

"And lets be grateful that Gina's mom also works crazy hours and can't take me to the hospital, I don't know if I could handle Gina practicing her makeup on me. She already does that enough when we hang out at Nana's" 

"Gina does your makeup when you go to your Nana's?" Amy asked, raising an eyebrow. She could not wait to make fun of him for this later. 

"Wait..no..I didn't say that." Jake sputtered, after realizing what he had just revealed. 

"Oh Pineapples, you got to learn to keep your mouth shut. I'm going to have way too many stories to tell your future girlfriend when we get older." 

"Oh Ames, don't make it seem like I couldn't tell your future boyfriend about some of the stuff you do. I mean between the power poses, binders, and your glasses I've got material for days." 

You see both kids knew that the information that they had on each other would never actually make it to anybody. Between Jake having the slightest crush on Amy, along with having a shred of decency he would take any embarrassing thing she did to the grave. And Jake was so outgoing and did so many dumb and stupid things on a regular basis, that whoever he ended up with would probably already know about all the dumb stuff he did in his attempts to act cool. Plus if it was up to Amy she wouldn't have to tell anyone because she and Jake would be boyfriend and girlfriend. She had disgruntingly realized a few weeks ago that she had a crush on her hyperactive, messy, sickly neighbor who she had been spending almost all of her free time with. 

"Kids time for dinner and grace!" Victor yelled out from the kitchen. Jake turned to Amy and sighed as he grabbed his cane that sat on the edge of the couch as she helped him stand. 

"Hey Ames, what’s grace? Is it like a type of food or something?" Jake asked, as the pair made their way toward the kitchen. 

"It's a prayer we say before we eat, we usually only say it on holiday's." Amy explained. 

"Is it a catholic thing? Cause I've never done it before." 

"I guess, maybe it's a Cuban thing. It doesn't usually come up in conversation with our friends so I wouldn't know. I thought everybody did it. But I guess not since you clearly don't." 

"Do I have to do anything, or can I just sit there while someone else does it. The closest thing I've ever done is the prayer we say before Shabbat, but usually my mom or Nana says it while the rest of us stay silent with our heads down." 

"Do you know the sign of the cross? Because you just have to do that, while Papa or Abuleo says that prayer." Amy knew Jake's father was some kind of Christian, but didn't know if they had practiced any of it. 

"The sign of the cross is the thing where you tap your head and shoulders with your finger, right?" 

"Don't worry about it Jake, just take a seat and listen. You don't have to worry about blessings or anything." Camilla said, helping the young boy into a chair. Karen had told her how nervous he was of her parents finding him annoying and hating him, she didn't want him to have to worry about anything more then he needed to." 

"What do you mean he doesn't need to worry about the blessing, and why is he sitting down before the prayer that's rude. Plus he's got a hat on, didn't anyone teach him it's disrespectful to wear hats inside. Especially at dinner during grace" Gloria Alverez, was an old fashioned hard core Catholic Cuban. She was a believed that things needed to be done in a very certain way, or else they were wrong or disrespectful. 

"Jake and Karen aren't Catholic, their Jewish so they don't follow our blessings. And Jake's sitting down because his legs aren't doing too well, he's very sick and has trouble walking. We're just trying to make him more comfortable." Victor explained, he knew that his wife's parents could be a lot and he didn't want it to effect Thanksgiving or make Jake and Karen feel uncomfortable in anyway. No one decided to comment on the hat thing, knowing how uncomfortable it would make him to remove it. 

"I kind of know the blessing, I've seen Mr. and Mrs. Santiago do it a few times while taking care of me. Plus I can stand, my legs don't hurt that badly right now. I should okay as long as I can hold onto something." Jake interjected, quickly using the table to pull himself up. His worse nightmare was coming true, Amy's grandparents hated him which was going to make the rest of the Santiago's hate him. It seemed to be in his nature to drive everyone that was close to him away. 

"I wouldn't worry about it too much mijo, their just old fashioned." Mrs. Santiago whispered in his ear, that made him feel slightly better. Knowing that his Nana could sometimes be the same way around some of the things his mom did differently religion wise. "Now Papi, I believe it's your turn to say grace this year." 

"In the name of the father, son, and the holy spirit amen." Luis Alverez started, as the rest of the Santiago's did the blessing Jake tried to copy them out of respect of what they believed in. As her father listed all things that everyone should be thankful for, Camilla held Jake's forearms to help keep him upright. After her mother's questioning Jake had insisted on standing through grace, it was clear that the medication had greatly effected Jake because not even in a minute into grace his legs had started shaking and Camilla was terrified that if she let go he would fall face first onto her floor. So her grip around him tightened taking more of his weight on as he struggled to stay standing, she debated on picking him up but she figured that Jake nor her parents would probably appreciate that. As her father winding down the pray, Camilla stopped him. Her mother looked at her horrified, it was taboo to interrupt grace. But Camilla felt the need to also ask God to keep an eye Jake and talk about how her family was thankful for them. 

"God, we also ask that you bless Jake and Karen. And help Jake beat this cancer. The Peralta's have been such a big help in adjusting to New York life and we are so grateful for them." 

Luis was not thrilled to be interrupted, however he was glad that his daughter had geared it toward people who clearly were in need of a little extra help. It was evident that the young boy that his daughter's family had taken a liking to was clearly not doing too well. With a glance at his daughter and her husband to see if they had anything else to add before ended the prayer, after it was clear that they didn't have anything else to say he ended the prayer by saying amen and doing the sign of the cross as his family followed suit. 

"Alright, Alex and everyone younger then him you will be eating in the kitchen. Everyone older Alex will be staying in here for dinner." Victor said as he turned toward the group children standing behind him. "Come line up and get your food then proceed to where you are sitting, this will not be like dinner where you all fight for food." 

"Jake why don't you go take a seat in the kitchen and I'll bring you a plate." Karen told her son, who was still desperately clinging onto Camilla's forearms to keep himself upright.

"Luis can you make sure Jake gets into the kitchen, he's looking a little unsteady right now." Camilla said turning to her oldest 

"I'll be fine Mrs. Santiago, just let me find my cane and I'll be good to go." Jake knew that he was perfectly capable of making it the few feet into the Santiago's kitchen on his own as long as he had his cane to help keep himself upright. However until he was able to locate it he had to continue to hold onto Mrs. Santiago so that way he didn't face plant on the floor. 

"It's right here Jake!" Amy sighed handing her best friend his cane, Jake was one of her best friends, however his ability to constantly lose things never ceased to amaze her. 

"Thanks Ames, what would I do without you?" Jake smirked 

"You'd be completely and totally lost Pineapples." Amy dead panned back. As Jake took his cane from Amy the two slowly making their way into the kitchen, Luis following behind him because despite Jake's protest there had been several times that come very close with making a personal acquaintance with their hardwood floor. Once Jake was safely seated and Luis was convinced that he couldn't hurt himself he returned into the dinning room to have dinner with his parents and older siblings. 

Karen quickly assembled a plate of food that she was pretty sure Jake would eat, because of all the medication he was on Jake's stomach was pretty touch and go and he tended to not have the largest appetite anymore and many of his favorite foods now made him nauseous. She knew that her son needed to eat more food or his doctor's where going to have to intervene, but she couldn't bring herself to fill his plate up with food like she usually would. He was having such a good day, and sometimes his good days felt far and few between and she didn't want to ruin that for him. Plus the Santiago's would be looking after him tonight and it felt wrong to leave a potentially sick Jake on their hands, they already did so much for her and she didn't want to make their lives any more difficult. 

"I'm not hungry." Jake said softly, as his mom put a plate of food down in front of him. Usually he would be all over the turkey and the mashed potatoes and bread, but his stomach still didn't feel right from chemo yesterday and he really didn't want to throw up again. "I'm sorry." 

"It's okay sweetie, just try to eat something please. You need to start eating more or Terry's going to have to put in that feeding tube we talked about and I know you don't want that." Karen tried to reason with her son, running her hand over his head. It was so hard to see him so sick like this. 

"I don't, but I don't want to throw up again. Plus my stomach still hurts from the chemo yesterday." Jake wanted to eat, he really did. However with so many of his meals coming back up a short time after eating them, he tried to avoid eating as much as possible. 

"Eat as much as you feel comfortable with, I'm not going to pressure you into eating a certain amount. But you need to eat something, even if it's just a little bit. I'm going to eat dinner, and then I'm off to work but I'll find you before I go." She gave Jake a kiss on the forehead one of her hands resting on his cheek before turning to Amy. "Alright you're in charge of making sure he eats, takes his medicine and keeping an eye on him. Think you can do that for me?" Getting what was probably too enthusiastic of a nod from Amy Karen chuckled and gave her a pat on the shoulder, knowing that her son was in good hands she left the kids alone and went to enjoy Thanksgiving with the people who had done so much to help take care of him. 

As the night winded down Karen had left for work, not before being forced out with some of the dessert that Camilla had insisted that they had plenty of. Eventually the food was cleaned up and the kids were changed into their pajamas in the Santiago living room watching football, much to Amy's dismay. Camilla and Victor stood in the doorway and smiled as they watched Jake passionately argue with some of their boys about who the better team was and how they correctly believed the game should be played. Before bed Amy had convinced her brother's and Jake to turn off the football game and put on Christmas movie, because it was the beginning of the Christmas season after all. Once they finished Elf, Amy's choice, Camilla interrupted her children and Jake and let them know it was time for bed. 

Normally when Jake stayed the night at the Santiago's he slept in the guest bedroom and their was a monitor in their so that Victor and Camilla could hear him if anything happened during the night. However, because it was Thanksgiving and Camilla's parents were over and they had taken the guest room, Jake was going to have to sleep on the pullout bed from the couch. Jake had originally argued that he could just sleep on the couch with a blanket and he'd be fine, Camilla and Victor on the other hand believed that Jake should sleep in bed or as close to one as possible this was mostly due in part to how much time he spent in uncomfortable hospital beds and recliners and they wanted to make him as comfortable as possible. After convincing Jake that it would not be too much trouble for them to set up the pull out bed, Jake was sound asleep under probably one too many blankets clutching his dinosaur stuffed animal that he brought with him. It was a little after 1 in the morning when Jake felt his stomach lurch, he knew he was going to be sick. Stupid Thanksgiving dinner. 

"Mrs. Santiago?" He called out softly, not wanting to wake anyone else up. 

"What is it Jake?" Camilla said slowly sitting up from where she had fallen asleep. 

"I think I'm gonna throw up." And by the time Camilla's over tired brain had processed that statement, he was gagging. She quickly got up and ran into the bathroom and grabbed the bin that they reserved for Jake when he felt sick and thrust it under his chin just in time before he threw up. She helped him into a sitting position as his body heaved out the contents into the little plastic bin that Jake's doctor had so graciously given him when he found out they were going to be taking care of Jake. 

"It's okay, mijo, it's okay." She tried to soothe him, as she rubbed her hands up and down his back. Despite having helped him so many times in situations similar to this, it never got easier seeing him like this. 

"How can I help?" Victor asked sleepily as he made his way downstairs, he always slept lightly when Jake slept over. Always prepared to help him and make sure that he didn't need to go to the hospital. 

"Go get me a cold washcloth that I can put on his neck, his sweating and I can't tell right now if it's from a fever or throwing up but either way we need to cool him down." Victor made a beeline for the bathroom quickly going into the cabinets and getting a washcloth and running it under cold water before handing it off to his wife. Before heading into the kitchen to get Jake a Gatorade from the supply they kept in their fridge. 

"I'm sorry that I woke both you guys up." Jake said softly once he had finished throwing up, gladly taking the blue Gatorade from Mr. Santiago. He always felt guilty when he woke either Santiago's or his Mom up in the middle of the night because he felt sick. He knew that they always played it off like they weren't tired, but he could see it the next morning or hours later when they had an extra cup of coffee or laid down some where and tried to rest. 

"You have nothing to be sorry for mijo, we'd much rather be up and helping you then let you go through it on your own." Camilla explained, taking the bucket from his hands and it handing it her husband to have him clean it, before disappearing for a moment to find the thermometer. "Alright now let me take your temperature, because you were pretty hot a few moments ago and if you do have a fever then we need to take you to the hospital." 

"I don't have a fever! I don't need to go to the hospital!" Jake had already had one instance where he had had a fever and had been forced to go to the hospital. Because of his weakened immune system he was kept separate from everyone and they had to run painful tests and give him medicine that made him feel worse then chemo did. He really had no instance in repeating that instance. 

"I know your nervous Jake, but if you have a fever the hospital is the best place for you to be." Before Jake had time to reply she stuck the thermometer under his tongue. After waiting for a few minutes it beeped and she pulled it out. "98 degrees, looks like you're in the clear mister." Camilla smiled, rubbing her hand over his forehead as he settled back down under the covers. 

"Told you." He mumbled, suddenly feeling very tired again. 

"Yes you did, now don't go to sleep on meet young man. Let's go rinse out your mouth, you don't want to go to bed with it tasting like throw up." Jake gave a non committal groan in response, he really just wanted to back to bed and he didn't have the energy to walk over to the bathroom. Mrs. Santiago must have sensed this because she pulled him into her arms and carried him to the bathroom, continuing to hold him there as she gave him a cup of water to drink and spit out. Once she was sure that Jake had fallen back asleep, Camilla went into the kitchen to replenish Jake's Gatorade and get herself a drink of water before she went back to be. As she grabbed another small bottle of the blue drink out for Jake and a water bottle for herself she was shocked to be meet her mother's face. 

"Mama, what are you doing awake?" She questioned, it was far too late for anyone to be up if they didn't have to be. 

"I heard that young boy, Jake, it sounded like he was sick and I wanted to make sure he was okay." 

"He's fine, he woke up sick and he just feel back asleep. Sometimes big meals do that to him, especially after he has chemo." 

"You spend a lot of time helping this boy, don't you?" Gloria could tell that this boy meant a lot to her daughter's family, she also couldn't help but be proud of how she had taken in the young boy as one of her own. It reminded her of her village in Cuba, any of the women in the town treated the kids as if they were their own. 

"His mom works two jobs to help pay for treatment and keep their heads above water, and his dad left right after he was diagnosed. We do what we can to help, especially because they helped us out when we first moved here. Karen would take all eight of them when we had to do stuff around this house, or meet with people. It feels like the least we could do."

"He seems like a good kid and he seems to make Amy very happy." Gloria could tell by the way the two talked and interacted together that they each meant a lot to each other. 

"Mama, their only 8." Camilla said exasperated, knowing that her mother was already thinking about marriage between the two of them. 

"I'm just saying." Gloria said nonchalantly putting her hands up in defense. "It's late mija, get some rest" 

"I will, promise." 

"Oh and I'll tell the church to keep Jake in their prayers, it looks like he can use all the help he can get." 

"Goodnight mama." 

Gloria chuckled as she watched her daughter head back to the couch. She recalled the moment she first saw Jake, he seemed almost to small for his age, was using a cane to help him stand as he heavily leaned into his mother's side with a beanie covering must of his head, he was clearly very ill. However he had the biggest smile plastered on his face as he made his way to where her grandchildren were sitting. She had seen so many people who were much less sick then him be miserable and whiny, she had expected him to be the same way. However, he was almost the polar opposite, he always had a smile on his face and was cracking jokes. He seemed like your typical little boy, to be able to battle a disease at such young age, while having such a positive attitude was something that most adults struggled with. She knew that if he was able to do that, as young as he was, that he was a special kid. Gloria knew there wasn't a cure for cancer, and that it was one difficult to disease to fight, especially for children, she knew that boy was going to need some external force to help so she decided that she'd keep him in her prayers. As she made her way back to the room where she and her husband where staying, she thought of maybe collecting some toys or money for him as the holiday season was fast approaching, after all he'd been through deserved to be spoiled a bit. Gloria knew that it would be some work, rallying the church beyond a divorced Jewish mother and her son, but she would do anything to help keep the smile on that kid's face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, y'all this was kind of a weird chapter. It's long and drawn out and I couldn't find a great way to end it, and I get really wordy when I can't end things. Anyway let me know if you guys are enjoying the work and if you have anything that you want to see in the story. I'm always open to ideas.


	6. Chapter 6

Karen did feel bad for leaving her son so often, he had spent a greater part of the past month with the Santiago's and she bad for being so absent. Despite all this though she had still managed to be there for all the important things he went through. She was there for his first surgery and chemotherapy treatment, when he shaved his head in their bathroom with his best friend, his first long term hospital stay and today. Today Jake was to receive his first dose of intrathecal chemotherapy, along with his second bone marrow biopsy and spinal tap. She knew that today was going to be a long and difficult day for him, but she had managed to score two Nets tickets from a fellow teacher at school who couldn't attend the game and would be taking him once he was released from the hospital later today. Jake loved the Nets and Karen knew that he'd be over the moon to get attend the game, all she needed to do was just get him through the day. Which started with waking him up, Jake wasn't an early riser by any means before he got sick, but since getting sick Jake seemed to need every moment of sleep that he could get. 

"Come on Jake, you need to get up." Karen said sitting on his bed, rubbing her hand up and down his back. 

"It's too early." Jake mumbled, throwing the sheet over his head. He was right it was early, it was about 6 in the morning, meaning that it was far too early for anyone to be up on the weekend. 

"I know, but we need to get you up so we can get to the hospital on time." She tried to ration with him, not that that usually went well. 

"I don't want to go to the hospital." Her son said, now growing quiet. She knew that he was feeling apprehensive about his appointment and procedures today. 

"I know sweetie, I know but we need to do this procedures to see if the treatments having any effect so far." 

"I'm scared though. Their gonna stick a needle in back!" 

"It's okay to be scared, but you're gonna be asleep when the stick the needle in your back so you're not going to feel anything. Now can you get dressed for me please?" 

"Ok, but I need some help though."

Karen sighed as she handed him the shirt and pants she'd had him layout last night. Usually once Jake was up and moving he was fine and relatively stable getting around, however when he had to stand up after sitting for long periods of time, he didn't do so well. Doctors had explained to them that his joints and muscles tightened up so much that it almost locked them in place, meaning that he needed extra assistance. Once he was dressed, Karen picked up the bag that was in the corner of his room and grabbed it before picking him up and heading out the car. Jake was quieter than usual on the ride over to the hospital, usual when they were going for chemo he would talk and sing along to the radio like he had before had gotten sick. Now his leg jiggled anxiously and his hands were wringing in his lap, she wanted to tell him his surprise right there to make him feel better, but she knew that it would be worth it in the end to see his face as they pulled up to the Barkley's Center that night. 

"I know that you're nervous Jake, but the sooner we get inside and get the day started, the sooner you're going to be all done and we can go home." Karen told, lightly putting her hand on his shoulder to snap him out of his chance. 

He looked at her and sighed before grabbing his cane from the floor behind him and getting out of the car. The pair entered the children's portion of the hospital, after checking in a nurse had Jake sit in a wheelchair before bringing them to an outpatient room in the oncology wing where they would be spending most of their days. Once Jake got settled in the bed nurses came in and begin hooking him to monitors along with checking his vitals. Jake's vitals had to be checked every time they came to the hospital because if something was just a hair off then the treatments either had to be altered or not performed at all. The primary concern always being his temperature, if he was ever running a fever then he could not receive chemo and would need to be admitted for an observational stay. Karen had heard stories of children coming in with fevers week after week, meaning that they could not receive chemo, leading doctors to have to find extra measures to try and keep them alive. Fortunately Jake had never spiked a fever before having to get chemo, so this was something they generally didn't have to worry about, although it terrified Karen that one day it would happen and the doctors would have to turn him which ultimately cause the disease to spread and take him form her. Morbid thoughts look this spun around in Karen's head all the time, she knew it wasn't healthy and that she should probably seek some kind of help but she just didn't have the time or money to seek out such resources. 

"Karen, can I speak with you in the hall for a second?" Terry asked, poking his head into Jake's room. 

"Sure, I'll be out in a second." Surprisingly Terry coming in and saying that he needed to talk to her was what she needed to break the spiral of depressing and terrifying thoughts she found herself having on days like today. "I'll be right back okay." She said turning and giving Jake a kiss on the head before making her way out in the hall. 

"I'm just going to run through what is going to be happening with Jake today." Terry paused for a second and waited for Karen to nod before continuing speaking, "first we're going to do his intrathecal chemotherapy, unfortunately we are going to have to keep him awake for that. Once that's done we're going to give him about an hour or two to recover and then we're going to do the bone marrow biopsy and spinal tap, which he is going to be under anesthesia for. Once his done with those tests we'll monitor his vitals for a bit and give him something to eat and then you two will be free to do. Any questions?"

"I thought you said that Jake could be sedated for the chemo?" Jake was so terrified of having a needle in his back and Karen knew that he wasn't going to react well to this news at all. 

"I know we talked about that, however because he is also having his bone marrow biopsy and spinal tap today as well we figured it would be better to sedate him as they are much more painful and longer tests. I understand that he's nervous and we are going to do the best we can to keep him comfortable and as pain free as possible, you'll also get to stay with him for that portion if it's any consolation." Terry knew that Jake had a severe aversion to needles, it's why in the upcoming weeks he was going to have surgery again to replace his port with a Hickman line, which would mean he wouldn't have a needle stuck in chest for treatment. And Terry felt awful that he had to keep the poor boy awake for what was probably going to be a painful experience, however the hospital couldn't risk putting him under twice in one day without it being a necessity and unfortunately Jake's intrathecal chemo was not considered a necessity. 

"It's fine, I understand. Would you like me to explain it to him or are you planning on it?" While Karen was not exactly thrilled with decision, she understood it. 

"If you would like to go and talk to him first I can come back in a few minutes, he's not going to start his chemo injection for about another half or so anyway. So there's no rush." 

"Alright, I'll go talk to Jake. I'll see you in a few minutes." Terry smiled and nodded at her before making his way down toward the nurses station. As she walked back into the room to talk to her son, she tried to steel herself for the tears, anger and fear that were about to come. "Hey Jake, can I talk to you about something for a second?" She asked, sitting next to him on his bed and motioning for him to turn the TV off. 

"What's up mom? Is something wrong? Am I dying?" Any calm and reserve Jake had, had flown out the window when his mom said she wanted to talk to him. Last time she'd said that he'd found out that his Dad had left them. 

"No, no you're not dying. It's just about what's going to happen today." 

"Oh ok. I thought that was Terry's job." Jake was confused, usually Terry always dropped by and explained what was going on. 

"Terry's still going to come by and give you the rundown, so don't worry you're still going to get your dose of him and his stories today. It's more so about a slight change that's happening, Terry thought it'd be better if I talked to you about it. You remember how I said that you were going to be asleep when they had to put the needles in your back today?" Karen paused and waited for Jake to nod, she noted as his eyes grew wide before she continued, "well because you're having some tests later today which have to be asleep for, the doctor's though it would be best for you to stay awake for your chemo injection." 

"Cool…cool…cool…cool I'm just going to have a needle stuck in my back, everything's fine." Jake muttered, his anxiety picking up. He could distantly make out the sound of his heart monitor starting beat faster, giving away his nerves. 

"I know that it's scary but they're going to do their best to keep you as pain free as possible, you know Terry wouldn't have you do something unless he thought it was absolutely necessary and would only keep you safe. Plus I'll be with you the whole time." Karen smiled slightly, her handing running over the top of his beanie. 

"You'll be with me the whole time." Jake asked timidly, sure he was nervous, but having his mom with him would make a lot better. Plus it was like she said, Terry would never do anything to intentionally hurt him. 

"The whole time, even you would rather me leave, I'd still be right by your side." Jake smiled at her confirmation and sunk back further under the thin sheets of the hospital bed, as long as his mom was by his side he could get through anything. 

The hour leading up to the procedure Karen mostly spent filling out paperwork, while Jake tried to contain his nervous energy. On a normal day, Jake was the equivalent a child discovering what caffeine was, but right now he was like the energizer bunny on steroids. The nurses did their best to keep his energy directed at something, as they bought in games and movies that he could watch to keep his mind off things. Even Terry came in at one point and told him the story of the Ebony Falcon, a character he made up based on himself, he had once been a police officer but had became a doctor after he watched a young boy die in his arms because they couldn't save him from abusive parents, the stories were the only thing that had gotten Jake to sit still for more than 5 seconds. And before Jake knew it a team of doctor's and nurses had crowded his room, he had his shirt off and some kind of cream was being rubbed onto his back to try and help numb it. His mom was seated next to his bed, holding one of his hands in hers while the other rubbed gently over his beanie trying to soothe him as best as she could. 

"Alright Jake, I'm going to back you're back with a needle can you let me know if you feel any pain." Terry really hated having to do this procedure to kids awake, more often than not if left them in tears and he couldn't help but feel like he was hurting them instead of helping them. When he Jake nod he took a needle and pushed it towards Jake's spinal column. 

"I don't feel any pain, but it feels really weird." Jake gulped as his grip around his mom's hand tightened, he did not like the feeling of this at all. 

"Alright that means that the anesthesia is working, so I'm going to start now. I just need you to pull your knees up towards your chin and keep them there until I'm done. I'm going to try and make this as quick as possible." Jake did as he was told and he could already feel tears starting to run down his face, he wasn't sure if he'd ever been this scared in his life. 

"Mom!" Jake said apprehensively. 

"I know sweetie I know, I'm going to be right here with you the whole time." Karen promised, pressing a kiss to her son's forehead. 

"Alright I'm going to start now Jake." As soon as the needle entered Jake's back for real he cried out in pain, this was the worst pain he'd ever felt in his entire life. 

"Mommy it hurts!" Jake cried out, his grip become iron glad around his mother's as he tried to draw himself into a tighter ball in an attempt to stop the pain.

"Shh, just breathe Jake." Karen tried to keep strong, she knew he needed her right now and she couldn't cry. Her hand moved to cup the back of his neck to keep it in place as he tried to get away from Terry's grasp. 

"I want to go home!" 

"Stay with me Jake, you're being so brave!" Karen just about felt her heart shatter in two, it was so difficult to watch him be in unspeakable pain and there was nothing she could do about it. 

"No! No! Get it out!" He cried as he felt the medicine enter his back, all of a sudden it was difficult to breathe and within moments an oxygen mask was placed over his face which helped him calm down a little as he felt like he could take deep breathes again. 

"I'm almost done Jake, just a little bit more and then you're all done! You did such a good job and you're so brave." Like Terry said before, he really hated doing this to kids awake. 

"I want it done now!" Jake cried, he knew that he shouldn't be yelling at the doctor's right now but this hurt a lot and he really wanted nothing more than for it to be over. 

"Keep breathing Jake, Terry just has to take the needle out and then you'll be all done." Karen whispered as she continued to stroke his head. The procedure had lasted only around 5 minutes or so, but in the future she vowed that he would always be under sedition so that way he would never have to feel this kind of pain again. 

"Ok Jake you're all done! Now we're going to get you a nice warm blanket and some ice chips and you and you're mom are going to relax until it's time for us to take you back for your tests. Because you were so brave and you did such a good job, we're going to bring you something extra special once you can eat again. Okay?" Terry told Jake moving so that Jake could see him, acting as almost a visual confirmation that worst was over. 

"Ok." He replied back tiredly, he was exhausted from the events that just transpired and wanted nothing more than to take a nap. Terry must have understood because he patted him on the shoulder before ushering all the other doctors and nurses out of the room. 

Jake had been in out of sleep for a greater portion of the morning. Karen was relieved that he was finally getting some rest, seeing Jake in that much pain had been one of the most heartbreaking and challenging moments in her life. And she had her husband leave her. When Terry came in to check on Jake she made it abundantly clear that any other time Jake had to receive this chemo it would be done under sedation. Fortunately Terry agreed with her and said that if it weren't against hospital rules he would have just seated Jake twice today, and explained that it was the worst feeling as a doctor to see kids in that much pain while trying to help them. When she wasn't talking with doctors or fussing over Jake, Karen was giving Camilla updates on Jake, the Santiago's were going to have Jake tomorrow and she tried to prepare her for what kind of Jake she might be encountering tomorrow. Karen knew that they were going to see the Santiago's tonight and that she could just explain it then, once Karen had told the Santiago's that she had scored Nets tickets they had also agreed to buy some in the same section so that the two families could have a fun outing together, but because Roger wasn't around and her mom still worked and helped take care of Gina, her best friends daughter, Karen felt alone and it almost helped to have someone out there to give updates to. At around noonish Jake had either slept off all the exhaustion or was at least feeling okay enough to be awake for more than 5 minutes. 

"I'm hungry." Jake hadn't eaten since dinner last night because he was going to be put to sleep today, as the day grew on he found himself getting more and more hungry. 

"I know, they just have to do the tests and then you'll be all done and you can eat whatever you want. Do you want some ice chips for now, I know they're not much but at least it's something." Karen felt Jake's pain, she remembered when she had been in labor with him for fifteen hours and hadn't been allowed to eat anything except for ice chips. She understood that her little boy had to be starving and was going to do her best to keep him content before the doctors sedated him. 

"Fine." Jake grumbled, what he wouldn't do for a good pack of gummy worms right now. He sighed as he ate the ice chips that the nurses had left him, his mom was right they didn't do much but it was better then not eating anything at all. 

At around 1 the anesthesiologist came in and explained to Jake and Karen how he was going to be sedated and let Jake pick the flavor mask he would use to be put under. While Karen filled out forms about his weight and allergies, she knew that the hospital had all of these on record already, but it was better to have them written down again just as a precaution. Terry had came back as well and explained what the tests would be looking for and what they would show and why they were being run at all. 

"Alright, we're going to take Jake to another room now where we're going to perform the tests. Would you like to come with us Karen?" Terry saw how heavily Jake had relied on Karen to get him through the first procedure earlier, he knew that this would be much easier then what Jake had endured before but that it could still be scary and that he would benefit from having his mom with him. Plus he felt it also kept the parents at ease seeing that their child was completely asleep and in good hands. 

"Sure." She smiled looking down at her son, Jake was glad that Terry had asked if his mom wanted to come with them. He'd only had one surgery prior to this and she had been allowed to come with him, Jake wasn't sure if that was usually allowed or just a special circumstance because he'd never had surgery before. The room that they were going to his tests in were cold and had a lot of machines in it, his doctors and nurses made quick work of attaching him to all of them along with getting him a blanket to help warm him up. Once he was attached to all the machines the anesthesiologist had came in and had him start breathing into the mask that smelled like strawberry. He started to feel very tired all of a sudden, and as he began to drift off he heard the faint encouragements of the doctors and his mom. Jake wasn't sure how much time had past since he had fallen asleep, but he realized he had changed rooms again. The lights in this room were dim and the machines that he was surrounding to were lit up slightly, he rubbed the sleep from his eye and tried to figure out what was going on. 

"Mom?" He called out, in his first look around the room he hadn't seen her. But he was still feeling pretty out of it. 

"I'm right here Jake." She whispered as he felt her grab his hand. Jake smiled at the contact and was glad that the day was over, he wanted nothing more than to go home and lay on the couch with his mom watching Die Hard. "The doctors are just going to monitor you for a little while and then we can go home. I also heard that Terry is going to bring you a special treat because you were good with all your tests today." 

After having his tests run check had been kept for observation for about 2 hours, to make sure his vitals stayed constant and that he didn't have any adverse reactions to what they had done today. The surprise that Terry had promised had turned out to have been an ice cream sundae along with the typical post surgery slushes he was given after anything big had happened. It ended up being around 5 at night when they had finally been released from the hospital, as his mom carried him out to the car he rested his head on the crock of her neck. This morning he had believed that they day would never end and that he'd be miserable and in pain for most of it, other then the injection he'd had earlier this morning he felt fine and was proud of himself for getting through it with minimal tears. He thought this was what growing up must be. Jake had ended up drifting back off to sleep on the drive home from the hospital and felt himself wake up as his mom put the car in park. When he looked out the window he expected to see their house, but was instead met with the bright lights of Barkley center. 

"This isn't home?" He said confused, he had no idea why they would be at the Barkley center. 

"Someone had work had two tickets to tonight's game and knew that you were a big fan, so they gave them to me for free. I thought I'd surprise you as a treat for how well you've done everything so far and how brave you've been. So surprise!" Karen said looking at her son excitedly, the tears she had seen on his face earlier today had been replaced by pure excitement and awe. 

"We really get to go to the Nets game tonight!" Jake exclaimed, he could not believe how cool his mom was. 

"Yup and according to a text I just got the Santiago's are inside waiting for us. So what do you say? Do you wanna go?" Karen hadn't even finished her sentence when her son began fiddling with his seat belt and grabbing his cane from the back of his and getting out. Karen chuckled lightly and grabbed the Nets jersey she'd brought him as she helped him out of the car. 

"You're the best Mom ever!" He said excitedly as she helped him pull the jersey over his head. 

"I know, now come put this mask on. It is going to be full of germs in there, and while I want you to have fun tonight I would really like it to not end in a lenghty hospital stay in a week or two because you caught some bug." Even the thought of having to wear one of those stupid hospital masks could wipe the smile off his face. 

The Nets one that night and Jake went home, happier then he had been since he was first diagnosed. That night he had great seats, got to shoot a free through at half time and even made it on the jumbo Tron. He was so wiped from the days events that he fell asleep almost as soon as he got in the car. The day had sucked all the way up until his mom surprised him and had ended up making it into one of the best days he'd had in recent. He thought that maybe things would finally start to turn around things would finally start to go his way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We love a good angsty chapter with a happy ending. I hope you all enjoyed, let me know if you have any ideas or things you want to see in this story. Also I go back to school on Monday, so I'm going to let you all know that my production quality is going to drop dramatically and I'll be probably update a a few times a month at best.


	7. Chapter 7

As Thanksgiving turned into December, New York seemed to get a whole lot happier. That seemed to be especially true for a young boy who is gravely ill and the people that spent time taking care of him. With holiday festivities popping around the city the Santiago's thought that it would be fun to take Jake down to Bryant Park where there was a winter festival typically held, they thought it would be a way for him to get out of the house and have a little fun. Something that seemed to be increasingly harder to find as his treatments started to wear on him. Clinging tightly to Victor as the man carried him, Jake's head swiveled around trying to take in everything around him. Because Jake had been raised primarily Jewish, he had never been to the Bryant Park Christmas festival before and he was amazed at the sight it was. It had taken some convincing on the Santiago's part, plus his promise that he would try to keep himself as safe and germ free as possible, which included wearing the hospital mask that he hated so much. 

Victor couldn't help but smile at the young man in his arms, Jake approached life such a childlike reverence and happiness that it was hard to not get sucked into that. Victor knew that the Peralta's had struggled financially, even with two incomes, and he wondered if Jake had gotten to experience one off day trips like his family had taken him on today. As the continued to walk through the park Jake shifted in Victor's arms slightly, trying to get into a more comfortable position. The results from some tests had come back and they had found that cancer hadn't spread luckily, still his counts weren't great and there was a heavy dose of cancer cells still left in his body, but Jake still had a good chance of getting through this alive and that was all anybody could have really asked for. Despite all this, Jake was still very sick and had bad days and good days. Some days he was in some pretty intense pain and needed constant attention and monitoring him, and then he had his good days where he seemed to have almost all his pre cancer energy back and if it weren't for his shaved head you probably wouldn't guess that he was even sick. Today, so far, seemed like a good day for Jake. He was in some slight pain, which is why Victor was carrying him instead of letting him walk, he seemed to be happy and pretty full of energy. 

"Hey Dad, can we go ice skating?" Manny asked running up to his dad, pointing at the makeshift rink a couple hundred yards away. 

"I don't know Manny, maybe we should stick to stuff that Jake can do as well?" Victor countered not wanting Jake to feel left out

"Nah it's fine Mr. Santiago, I don't mind watching. Even before I was sick I was a pretty bad ice skater." This was true, Jake was pretty awkward and clunky on his own two feet, putting him on skates only exemplified that. 

"Alright if your sure." Victor said rubbing the young boys back. Jake nodded back happily as Luis and some of the other boys took off towards the rink, Camilla following close behind. Amy however, stayed behind with Victor and Jake. "Mija, don't you want to go skating with your brothers?" He knew that Jake and Amy were pretty close, but Amy loved ice skating and was the best at it out of all his kids. So needless to say he was a little bit shocked when she hadn't gone running off with the rest of them. 

"Yeah I'd rather keep Jake company, I'm more fun to talk to then you are." The 8 year old answered back very matter of factly, earning a snicker from Jake and a raised eyebrow from her father. 

"Well why don't we find a place to go set and I'll see if I can go find some hot chocolate for Jake and I, I don't knw if you deserve on Amy after saying that I was boring." Victor said as he ushered his daughter toward a bench, earning a disgruntled sigh from her. 

"That's not fair dad! I didn't call you boring, I just said that Jake would have a better time with me. You're not boring, you're like the best dad ever!" 

"Well if I'm the best dad then maybe I can swing getting you a hot chocolate too mija." 

The three sat down at a little table next to a stand that was selling hot beverages and snacks. Victor set Jake and down and made sure Amy was good before getting in line for the hot chocolate, making sure to keep an eye on them at all times. In reality it really wasn't that cold out today, it was probably in the high 30s if Victor were to estimate. But as they had been walking through the park Victor could feel Jake shaking in his arms, this was mostly due to the fact that the boy had lost a pretty significant amount of weight and was so often sick now that his body was starting to run at a higher temperature. Fortunately he hadn't left the two kids alone long and had gotten them some drinks and pastries to snack on while they waited for the rest of the kids to finish skating. 

"Wow thanks Mr. Santiago!" Jake hadn't expected to get a drink and a snack, usually when his parents took him out they split something or he was told that they had food at home. 

"It's no problem, now drink up it's a little chilly out." Victor told him, as he saw Jake had began to visibly start shaking again. As Jake spent more and more time around his family Victor couldn't help but notice how easy it was to make Jake happy. He wasn't sure if it was because Jake had a relatively laid back personality, or that he came from a family with not a lot of disposable income, all it took was little things like this cup of hot chocolate or beanie when he had first shaved his head to make him happy. 

"This is really good hot chocolate." Jake muttered after the trio had feel into a comfortable silence. He wasn't sure if it was generally this good or if it was because he was freezing, but Jake thought this is one of the best cups of hot chocolate he'd ever had.

"I'm glad you like it, are you still cold Jake?" Victor asked, noticing that even with the hot chocolate Jake was still shaking from the cold. 

"A little bit, but you don't have to worry about me. I'm cold all the time, I'm used to this. I should have dressed warmer" Jake immediately felt guilty, he knew that the Santiago's worried about him a lot and he didn't want to ruin their family outing by making them worry about him. 

"It's fine mijo, once we finish the hot chocolate we'll see if we can either find somewhere warm to sit or something warm to wrap you in." He was kicking himself, Victor knew that Jake got cold easily and that they should have brought a blanket or something to wrap him up in if he got too cold. 

"Really, it's fine Mr. Santiago. You don't need to go hunt something down for me." Victor could see the look of guilt in Jake's eyes and decided to drop the matter, knowing that there was no use in arguing with him about this. 

Quickly Jake turned the conversation back to Amy, as the two started discussing a new kid they had met on Jake's floor yesterday named Charles. You see there was nothing medically wrong with Charles, his Dad was a nurse there so he spent a lot of time hanging around the hospital trying to help make sick kids feel better. He loved to bake and at least once a week would hand out whatever treat he made to patients on the floor. Victor had meet Charles with Amy and Jake yesterday and had watched them adopt the slightly awkward and off kilter boy into their friendship as they invited him to play scrabble with them and too lunch later on in the day. After about 30 minutes of sitting and chatting Camilla and her sons found where her husband and the two kids he was responsible for were sitting. As the boys began to recount what happened during their time skating, Victor got up and went to stand next to his wife. 

"We need to find Jake something warm to be wrapped in, he's pretty cold and hasn't stopped shivering in a while. Don't worry I checked, he doesn't have a fever. I think it's just the air temp." He explained to his wife. 

"I'm sure one of this little shops sells something, do you think we should take him home? I don't want him to not enjoy himself." Camilla asked, her eyes immediately drifting to the sick boy who was already pretty bundled. 

"I think he's just cold, he seems to physically be fine. I'm also pretty sure he thinks that he's inconveniencing us in some way and would feel immensely guilty if we went home earlier then planned."

"He's so stubborn, he's going to get himself sick." 

"I don't think he's being stubborn in this instance, I think that he's a little cold and doesn't want us spending the entire afternoon worrying about him. He wants us to have fun as well." 

The Santiago's and Jake spent a little more time at the park checking out some of the little kiosks and eventually finding a blanket to wrap Jake in to warm him up. Once they finished looking at everything they started to head home, making one pit stop at the tree in Rockefeller center. When talking to Jake yesterday about things they could do in Manhattan, while he knew it wasn't going to be lit up or anything, Jake had expressed in seeing the large tree. His parents usually promised to take him, but plans would fall through between their arguments and his dad's weird work schedule. The Santiago's had agreed and were more then happy to stop on the way back to Brooklyn to let the young boy see the tree, especially after hearing that he his parents had been promising to take him but had never made good on said promise. Rockefeller Plaza was pretty crowded when they arrived and Victor made to keep a tight hold on Jake, earning sad stares from people as they pushed their way towards the tree. Jake's smile grew about 5 sizes as he began to see the tree, the thing was even bigger in person! Jake wasn't sure why he liked the tree so much, especially for someone who's parents weren't too big on the whole Christmas thing. His Dad was Catholic, but because he was traveling so much he wasn't home to put up decorations or anything, except for the fake tree in their living room that went up a few days before Christmas. They had always celebrated both Hanukkah and Christmas, but Christmas always felt slightly off, maybe it was because his Dad wasn't that in to it or because his parents ended up spending half the day fighting leaving Jake to play with his toys alone. 

Victor was watching the chaos around him when he felt Jake tug at his sleeve. Originally he thought that he was going to be asked to put down, but he followed Jake's finger and in the distance he saw a man he never expected to see. Roger Peralta. Ever since Karen and Roger split, Roger hadn't been back to the neighborhood and hadn't reached out to Karen or Jake at all. Victor had assumed that he was cutting all ties and trying to leave his past behind, and moving forward with whomever he had cheated with Karen on. Victor could feel Jake tense, and he rubbed his back in an attempt to bring him back from whatever thoughts were swimming through his head. 

"Do you want to go talk to him?" Victor asked, Jake had been crushed when Roger had left and he wasn't sure if Jake had any interest in ever seeing him again. However, he had to ask because he couldn't deny Jake that chance in pretending that he hadn't seen him. Getting a nod from Jake in response, he seemed to be too shocked to speak, Victor made his way toward the father of the boy he treated like his own son. 

"Dad?" Jake questioned, his voice wavering a bit. He saw his dad stop dead in his tracks and turned to a face him, a surprised look on his face. He clearly had never expected to see him again. Jake wondered if he was making a big mistake. 

"Jake? Buddy hi." Roger said awkwardly, the last thing he expected while out with his girlfriend was to see his deathly ill son again. His girlfriend clearly looked confused, and he wondered if he should tell her who he was. 

"Who's this?" She asked, confused by the young boy who had called him Dad. She knew Roger had been married when they'd started dating, but he'd never mentioned having a son. 

"This is my son Jake. He's from my marriage with Karen." Roger sighed, he figured it was better to admit the truth then lie to her. She'd probably figure it out eventually anyway. 

"Do you want to talk to him alone?" Victor asked, he felt like he was intruding on some conversation that Jake should probably be having with his father alone. 

"Yeah, but stay close by. I don't know how long my legs will last." Jake told him, as Mr. Santiago put him on the ground. Victor made sure, Jake was steady before going off to find his family and let them know what was happening and move them closer where Jake was. 

"So, uhh how's treatment going?" Roger wasn't really great with talking to Jake when he lived at home, he had no idea how he should talk to his sick son. 

"Pretty good, they hurt a lot. Mom had to get another job to help pay for them, the Santiago's watch me a lot." Jake was currently regretting Mr. Santiago leave him alone to talk with his dad, Especially since his legs were starting to hurt. "I'm sorry for making you leave." 

"Yeah it's fine, I was probably going to see how things with you're mom played out but you getting sick really pushed me over the edge to move out." It was true, Roger was going to see how long he could keep the affair going while still being married. But once Jake got sick he decided it would be better just to leave, he had never really loved Jake. He was too loud and too awkward and that really wasn't Roger's speed. 

"Oh." Jake felt tears begin to water in his eyes, he had always hoped that his Dad leaving had been due to some other factor. But getting actual confirmation was like a punch to the gut and just like that Jake felt anger growing inside of him. "I HATE YOU!" He finally cried out, his legs starting to shake even more, whether from anger or exhaustion he'll never know. "I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!" Roger was clearly taken back by his son's statement, after all he had done for that little brat, he had the nerve to say he hated him. 

"Well I hate you too! The only reason I married your mom was because she got pregnant with you when we were dating and I felt bad at the time and didn't want to leave her alone, if I had known that you were going to be such an annoying ungrateful kid then I would have left as soon as we found out! I never loved you, I just put up with you so you're mom would let me keep living at home!" 

"You never loved me?" Sure it was Jake's fault that he had made his dad leave, but he always assumed that he had loved him at one point. And just like that he felt the dam of tears he was holding break, and he started sobbing, loudly. 

"Jake shut up! You're causing a scene!" Roger was fed up and couldn't take the stares he was getting from other people, it was clear that most people would side with his son in this situation. After all he was clearly very sick and Roger had just admitted that he'd never loved him. Jake's sobs only continued to grow and he saw the family that Jake had been with start to come this way. He needed to shut this situation down now, clearly getting Jake to shut up verbally wasn't going to do it so he was going to have to do it physically. And as his son looked up and made eye contact Roger's hand made contact with his face, hard. And in an instant Jake was on the ground, Roger smiled he had finally got him to shut up for the first time in his life. "You don't know how long I've been waiting to do that for." And with that he turned and walked in the opposite direction, not caring as people shouted at him. He was never going to have to see Jake again, this was truly the best day of his life. 

When Victor and Camilla had heard Jake's conversation with his father escalate into an argument they rounded up their kids and made their way over to him. The yelling became one sided as Jake had clearly started sobbing and in slow motion the entire Santiago clan watched Roger Peralta slap Jake in the face. After standing stunned for a moment they rushed towards him, Victor debating chasing after Roger and arresting him but he knew that he was better suited helping Jake. Jake was clearly in some kind of shock, tears were still actively streaming down his face but no sound came out and he shaking. Victor realized the boy was either having a panic attack or about to have one. 

"Jake," Victor started softly not wanting to scare him, "I'm going to pick you up and take you inside and we're going to work all this out." Jake was only able to give a nod back, so Victor scoped him up in his arms and made his way into the shops below the plaza. He could feel Jake still shaking and heard him trying hold back tears. They were able to find a table away from everyone and when Victor set Jake down all hell broke lose. Jake started sobbing harder then anyone had thought possible, his breathes coming out in heaves as his entire body trembled. He had his arms wrapped around his torso and kept muttering that it was his fault to himself. Camilla and Victor tried to comfort him as best they could, but he was so worked up that they genuinely believed that he might pass out. 

"Whatever happened, is not you're fault Jake. You need to breathe with me. I know it's hard, but you got to try." Victor told him, his hand slowly rubbing up and down Jake's back to try and soothe him. 

"I can't…it's my fault my dad left." Jake sobbed, "he told me he didn't love me!"

Victor had no idea how to even respond to that, all he knew was that Jake was going to need some serious therapy over what happened today. However he was not a therapist so he did the best he could to try and comfort him. Eventually, after what seemed like forever, Victor had gotten Jake's breathing under control. He turned to his wife and told he that he was going to find some water and get some paper towels to wipe his face off with and to keep an eye on Jake. Amy sat down at the table next to her best friend, making sure he was okay. He seemed a little off and then in an instant she saw his eyes snap shut and began to fall forward her mom catching him before he hit the ground and then his entire body started to shake. Amy could distantly hear as her mom yelled at her brothers to go find her dad, as she watched in horror while her best friend shook uncontrollably on the ground. She felt as if she was having an out of body experience as she watched her mom get into an ambulance with her best friend explaining what happened, her dad was frantically calling Karen on the phone and trying to round her brother's up so they could follow their mom to the hospital and find out what was wrong with Jake. It wasn't until she heard her dad calling her name that she had remained frozen in place throughout this entire ordeal, she couldn't bring herself to move. Her dad must have sensed this because he grabbed her in his arms and got them to Brooklyn Methodist as fast as humanly possible. They met up with Camilla and now all they could do was wait. 

Jake was surprised when he woke up in a hospital room, last thing he remembered he was in Rockefeller Plaza sitting at a table. His brain felt like mush and he ached all over, the room was just a little too bright for his liking as well. As he started to wake up more he heard voices, he couldn't make out who they were but he was glad that there people here with him. 

"Mom?" He called out, trying to sit up a little. Only to be pushed back down. 

"I'm here baby. It's okay, you're okay! Don't try to sit up, just relax." When Karen had gotten the call that Jake had had a panic attack and then a seizure she bolted out of work and got to the hospital breaking every traffic law along the way. Fortunately the seizure had been caused by all the events that had transpired, and not due to a brain tumor or bad medication. 

"What happened and why do I feel so fuzzy?" 

"You had a seizure. It means that your whole body was shaking and you past out. You're going to be fine the doctor's just need to keep you over night to make sure you're okay." 

"Oh okay, I'm sorry I made dad leave. You can be mad at me." 

"Oh sweetie I'm not mad at you, and you didn't make your dad leave." Jake went to interject, but was quickly quieted down by his mom, "I know that he told you that you getting sick was why he left. I know that he also told you that he didn't love you, and I think that you getting him out of our lives has made it so much better. Cancer aside, aren't you happy that you don't have to listen to us fight anymore. Or have him yell at you because you got a bad grade on a test. If it took you getting cancer to get him to leave then so be it. I'm so proud of you! And I love you so much!" 

"Promise?" Jake couldn't help but feel a little vulnerable after everything that had transpired

"Promise." She replied, holding up her pinky and letting him latch his to hers. Knowing that a pinky swear was going to give him some kind of validation that she did in fact love him more then anything in the world. "Now are you up for some visitors because there are 10 people in the waiting room who would love to see you?" Jake smiled and nodded. His mom kissed his head and stepped out into the hall to let the Santiago's know they could come in. While Jake had been upstairs getting treated, the Santiago's had practically raided the gift shop downstairs and Victor had run out to pick him up a milkshake and some non-hospital grade toys as get well presents. 

"Are you ok?" Amy asked, he certainly was awake and talking. But his face was really white and he had a lot of wires and tubes coming out of him. 

"I'm fine, mom says that it was caused by everything that happened and the doctors just need to keep me over night to watch me." 

"Good, never scare me life that again dumb ass." Amy knew that cursing was wrong, but it felt justified in this moment and no one stopped her. "Who else am I supposed to bail out of trouble at school." 

"That's true, I have had quite the influence on you this year." 

Everyone settled in for the long haul, as Jake was brought up dinner and everyone else went down to the cafeteria in shifts to get food. As the Santiago's invited Jake and his mom to celebrate Christmas and Noche Buena with them, along with his mom inviting them over to celebrate one or all of the nights of Hanukkah, Jake thought about what his mom said. He looked his mom, blood family, and the Santiago's, his found family, he had never felt more loved then when he was surrounded by the people in this room. He decided that he was going to keep hating his dad, and that his mom more than made up for his loss. Life was better without Roger and Jake was going to make sure it stayed that way, cancer be damned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was all pretty fluffy and then Roger just had to come in and ruin it. Honestly this was a weird chapter and feels kind of out of place but I figured I'd post it and see if y'all liked it anyway. We will be back to our more cancer and Jake and Amy fluff over the next few updates.


	8. Chapter 8

It was right before Christmas when Jake had had surgery to have his port replaced with a central line. This had been due to Jake's severe aversion to needles, every time he had come in for chemo or any tests he practically worked himself into a panic attack. So Terry talked to Karen and they both agreed that it would be better to move him to a central line, which required much less pricking and would hopefully make Jake more comfortable during hospital visits. After the surgery it had been touch and go for a few days and Jake was in a lot of pain, even more so then when they put his port in. But after a few days of observation and some medication to help the pain he was released, just in time for Christmas. They just had to do some last minute shopping, and then it was off to the Santiago's house where they would spend Christmas and Christmas Eve with them. 

"Who do we still need to get gifts for?" Jake asked tiredly, as his mom strapped him into the car 

"Just Amy. I was able to get all the boys yesterday when Mrs. Santiago came and sat with you yesterday." Camilla had spent most of yesterday with Jake, giving Karen a chance to go home and shower after spending so many days in the hospital with Jake. During that time she had actually finished up her Christmas shopping, picking up gifts for the Santiago clan and some last minute gifts for Jake. 

With Jake being sick, public transportation was essentially ruled out because they were living cess pools and Jake got sick so easily now that she didn't need the two of them mixing. So they had drive almost every where, which Karen didn't necessarily mind except for the fact that it was so expensive to park every where. Still paying for parking was much cheaper then paying for a long term hospital stay, not to mention safer. So Karen persisted and did her best to find cheap public parking or would just suck it up and pay whatever ridiculous price they were asking. The other upside to driving was that they were usually able to park much closer to the store rather then if they had to walk from public transportation. As Jake's treatment's continued to progress his mobility had gotten even worse, doctor's had concluded that it was because he was spending so much time sitting/laying down due treatment and generally not feeling well that it was causing him to lose muscle. On a good day Jake could walk with some assistance, usually a combination of his cane and his mom's hand keeping him up. On days like today Karen mostly resided to carrying him around, Terry had talked to her about getting him a wheelchair for days when Jake was really struggling and so that way Karen wouldn't have to carry him all the time. 

For Christmas Karen and Jake had decided to get Amy a science kit and forensics kit from a book store near one of the many colleges in New York. It had been Jake's idea, Amy talked all the time about science and how much she wanted to be a police officer. On day's when Jake was feeling well enough to play, on of the most common games that he and Amy played revolved around them being cops and having to arrest her brothers or her mom for "crimes" they'd committed. Amy wanted to be a police officer because of her dad and Jake wanted to be a police officer because of Die Hard. 

"Mom I want to walk." Jake said, once they had entered the store. Karen was surprised but couldn't really blame him, he had just spent days confined to his hospital bed. He must have been dying to use his legs a little bit. 

"You sure Jake? I don't mind carrying you." Despite not really having another choice, Karen knew that Jake felt bad that she had to carry him every where. He viewed himself as almost burdensome, it hurt her heart but Karen did her best to assure him that he wasn't one and to give him some freedom when ever she could. 

"Yeah!" Jake persisted, starting to squirm in her arms. 

"Alright, alright stop squirming. I'll put you down, be patient." Karen laughed as she placed him onto the ground. "Keep hold on me at all times, you just got out of the hospital I would really like it if we didn't go back today." Her hands around her son as she helped steady him, her arm eventually snaking around his waist to help keep balanced and upright. The pair made quick work of getting through the store and finding exactly what they needed, Jake had originally scoffed at getting Amy junior kits believing that she was too smart for them, but Karen pointed out that the Santiago's probably didn't want their 8 year old daughter dealing with anything made for adults. 

As they made their way to the register she noticed that one of the cashier was staring at Jake, in fact she was pretty sure that the women had been since her and Jake set foot in the store. As Karen got out her money to pay, she made sure Jake kept tight hold of the counter ledge so that way he wouldn't topple over. As Jake waited for his mom to finish paying he noticed the women staring at him. It pissed him off. Over the past month he noticed more and more people looked at him wherever he went, he didn't like it and it made him self-conscious. Why couldn't people see that he was still a normal kid. 

"You know you won't get cancer by looking at me." Jake said, shocking both himself and his mother.

"Jake!" Karen admonished, though feeling slightly proud of her son for calling out the woman on her rude behavior. She watched as the cashiers face turned bright red as she scurried off, muttering some faint apology as she did so. With the gifts in the bag Karen picked up Jake and headed back to their car. As she helped him buckle into the car she squatted down in front of him. 

"Want to talk about what just happened?" 

"She kept staring at me!" Jake muttered, "ever since I got sick people look at me differently. It's like they forget that even though I'm sick, I'm still Jake. It just pisses me off. I'm sorry for telling the woman that before." 

"Oh Jake" Karen's heart just about broke hearing her son verbalize the behaviors she hoped he hadn't noticed, she pulled him into a tight hug his body draining of all the tension as she did so. 

"It's okay. I know it’s hard to see other people treat you differently. It's usually because most people haven't met anyone with cancer, let alone a child. Despite it being rude, their just trying to deal with it and make sense of it. Usually they don't mean for it be rude, it can be jarring to see someone in your condition. You and I both know that, think of how we felt the first day on the ward. And I know that it sucks that people treat you differently, usually they're just trying to be helpful."

Jake let out a sigh, as he wiped some stray tears that fell from his eyes. "I know, it just makes me angry sometimes." 

"And that's okay, you're going through a lot and it's okay for things to make you angry or sad. But I know that you're the same kid from before you got sick and all of our friends and family do too and we love you just the same. Now let's get a move on or we're going to be late for Noche Buena". 

Because the Santiago's were Cuban they celebrated Noche Buena, the night was usually filled with Cuban food and midnight mass. The Peralta's had never experienced the holiday before and they were going to get the full experience. Camilla made every Cuban dish that had ever been made for the holiday, while her husband and kids finished decking out the house with holiday garb. With spending so much time helping take care of Jake, the Santiago's had fallen a little behind on the decorating train. At around 5 Jake and Karen should up with over night bags and a car full of gifts. Karen got Jake settled on the couch like she did so many times before, and then recruiting the help of some of the older Santiago boys to help carry everything. 

After stuffing their faces with all the delicious food that Camilla had made, everyone went off to get dressed in their nice clothes for church. Camilla had explained to Karen and Jake that they didn't need to come church, especially because Jake had just gotten out of the hospital. Jake had expressed seeing what church was like, partially because Amy and the Santiago's had come to temple with him during Hanukah. So he persisted, even if that meant getting dressed up in nice clothes right after being released from a few day long hospital stay when he wasn't feeling his best. 

'The Santiago's usually went to midnight mass on Christmas Eve, but with Jake and Karen along they figured it'd be best to move it up for the 10:00 one so that everyone could get back to the house earlier and Jake could get some rest. Although by the looks of it Jake was going to have trouble getting through the 10:00 mass, he was already nodding off in the pew by the time the priest entered and started the service. No one really had the heart to wake him as he looked so worn out, as a result Jake ended up sleeping through the majority of mass. Only kind of waking up when it ended as the Peralta's and Santiago's headed out to their cars respectively. Karen held a sleeping Jake in her arms as they waited for the Santiago's to finish saying hi to some of their church friends when the priest approached them. 

"You must Karen." The father said approaching the women holding her clearly very sick son, "Camilla has told me so much about you and your family." 

"Nice to meet you sir. This is Jake. It's very nice to meet you." Karen said, sticking out her hand for the older man to shake. She was really at a loss for what to do, she had never interacted with a priest before. She was Jewish and her ex husband, despite being raised catholic didn't exactly attend church frequently. 

"It's nice to meet you too. Would you mind if I blessed him, and said a prayer." The older man knew that the pair weren't catholic, but different religions aside he wanted to help the young boy the best he could. After receiving a nod from the boy's mother, he lapsed into Latin quickly blessing the young boy and saying a prayer for his health. 

The next morning 

"Jake!" Amy whispered, poking her best friend who was asleep in the guest bedroom. "Jacob." 

A smirk crossed his face as he rolled over and pretended to sleep, he loved messing with Amy. 

"Jacob!" Amy groaned, picking up in his teasing. 

"It's biblical." He muttered, borrowing further underneath the blankets. 

"It's not biblical moron, it's Christmas. Now get up and let's go downstairs and open some gifts." At the mention of Christmas, Jake's eyes shot open and he was immediately out of bed. 

"It's Christmas! Did we get any snow?" He asked excitedly, as he grabbed onto her for support as stood up. The pair made their way over to the window, squealing with excitement as the say the pavement covered in a sheet of pure white snow. "Lets go open gifts!" 

"Do you need help getting downstairs?" Amy asked softly noticing the way he clung to both her and the window sill for support. She paused for a moment and watched him nod his head before heading off to wake her older brother Luis to help them. 

"I heard someone was in need of a ride downstairs?" Luis chuckled tiredly as he made his way towards where Jake was sitting on the bed. He watched as his sister's best friends eyes lit up as he came into the room. Jake nodded excitedly as Luis picked him up, as they made their way toward the stairs Jake, with some extra effort, wrapped his ankles around Luis' waist. 

"Don't drop me or my mom will kill you." Jake muttered as Luis began to slowly make his way down the stairs. 

"I won't drop you. Plus my mom would kill me before yours got the chance, you're like her 8th son." 

"True true. So you're a dead man on both counts." Jake laughed, holding onto Luis tighter. Once the pair made their way down the stairs, they headed into the kitchen were the rest of the their families were waiting. His parents and Mrs. Peralta were chatting quietly and sipping coffee, while his siblings were anxiously waiting in the other room ready to open gifts. As Luis and Jake joined the rest of the kids he placed Jake on the floor next to Amy as their parents came in and joined them. After getting the nod from the adults, wrapping paper started flying every where. The nine children were yelling various thank you's as the parents watched as the pure chaos unfolded in front of them. 

Once Jake had finished opening all his gifts he made his way over to his mom to thank her for everything she'd gotten him. Being Jewish he knew that Santa Claus wasn't real, but he wanted Amy and any other of Amy's siblings to keep believing so he needed to do this discretely. With some assistance from Karen he was able to pull himself onto the couch, he wrapped her in a hug and muttered a quiet thank you as his mom pulled him into her arms. 

"I believe I have one more gift for you mister!" Karen said smugly as she reached behind her to pull an envelope off the back of the couch. She handed it to Jake who opened it slowly with shaking fingers, he hadn't expected to get this many gifts for Christmas. He knew that he and his mom were struggling because he was sick, and would have been okay with a few small gifts because Hanukah had just passed. He read over the paper a few times before realizing what it said. His mom had gotten them tickets to a Mets Yankees game in the spring. 

"You got us Mets tickets! You're the best mom ever!" Jake exclaimed excitedly, throwing his arms around his mom. 

In the afternoon some of Camilla's siblings came over for lunch, along with Jake's Nana, Darlene and Gina. Camilla's family had been a little awkward around Jake at first, as seeing the young boy so sick was quite the shock for people who weren't expecting it, but quickly once they introduced to his personality everything smoothed out. Jake was able to make it through lunch before retiring to the guest bedroom upstairs, already wiped from the days events. Later that evening when everyone had gone home, Camilla and Karen sat in the kitchen watching their kids hang out in the family. Each snapping a picture of Jake and Amy, as Jake had fallen asleep on Amy's shoulder her head resting on top of his.

"I think Jake had a good day." Ever since the altercation with his father Jake had seemed more and more sick, whether that was due to his harsh treatments or because of he was adjusting to the fact that his father would probably never come back, no one would ever know. But today was the happiest that he had been in a long time. 

"He did, best one in a while. Definitely since he saw Roger last, maybe even since before he got sick." Karen smiled, on the days where Jake seemed like he wasn't going to make it out of this alive, it was good to have days like today that reminded her that her son despite all the medications and hospital visits was still the same Jake as the one she'd known before he'd gotten sick. Sure he'd changed, he was braver now, maybe even a little more mature, but he was still her Jake and so far not even cancer could break him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After so many angsty chapters, finally a little bit of fluff. Enjoy it while it lasts as we'll probably be returning back to angst the next chapter. I hope you all enjoyed a Christmas chapter in February, a little late, but hey who doesn't love some good holiday feels at in the middle of winter. Please let me know if you guys enjoyed it, and I hope to get another chapter up within the next week or two.


	9. Chapter 9

It had not been a good week for one Jacob Peralta. Early in the week Terry and some of his other doctors had decided to switch him to a different chemo drug to see if it would have less side effects and be more effective than the one, he was currently on. It did the opposite however, the new drug made Jake sicker then he'd ever been before. Other than his typical side effects of exhaustion, nausea, and slight pain; he had started to develop sores, burns, and rashes all from the new treatment. His mom had talked to Terry about it, and unfortunately, they had to wait for Jake to finish up this current week's dose and then he could be moved back to the old one. They had tried a few different chemo drugs on Jake since he first started treatment and usually if he had any kind of adverse reaction, he was able to bounce back pretty quickly, but this drug had left Jake feeling overall pretty miserable and everyone around him thought the last good day he'd had was Christmas which was a few weeks ago at this point. 

He had gotten a few good minutes of sleep, which seemed to be more then he had gotten the past few nights, as he drove from the hospital to the Santiago's house where he would be spending the rest of his day. His mom had already taken off most of the week to try and help him through the worst of the side effects, however with rent and bills being due soon she had to go back to work, Jake knew that but he really wanted nothing more than to be holed up on the couch with his mom and his favorite stuffed animal while they watched TV together. He knew they'd arrived at the Santiago's house when he felt the car stop and his mom pull him into her arms, he let out a grunt of pain as she did so. He had hurt everywhere for the past week or so. 

"He's not having a good day, is he?" Camilla Santiago asked as she opened the door for Karen and Jake. She could see some kind of a rush or burn creeping up on his neck, and his normal smile had been placed with that of pain. 

"No, he hasn't been having a good week if I'm being honest with you, but yes today is a particularly bad one." Karen sighed as she went to go get Jake comfortable on the couch, "Terry and some of his doctor's put him on a new chemo drug and he has not reacted well at all. Usually he's able to bounce back quickly, but this dose is really running him ragged. He's been having fevers on and off, been throwing up more than normal and he seems to be in pain constantly. Terry said that they’re going to switch Jake to a different drug next week, but he's going to have to finish riding out the side effects of this one unfortunately." 

"Ohh poor kid, is there anything I should be on the lookout for if I need to take him to the hospital?" 

"Not really, I've taken him to the ER twice this week and they said that he just needs to deal with these symptoms. Unless something seems really wrong, like he's not responding then I'd say take him to the hospital. The best thing you can do is try and keep him comfortable, which is going to be difficult, but it's the only thing the doctor's said we could do for him." Karen explained sadly looking at her son, seeing him in this much pain had been truly heart breaking and she felt awful that there was nothing that she could do to help make him feel better. Quickly glancing down at her watch and giving a small sigh as she realized that if she didn't leave now, she'd be late for work, "Jake I've got to go to work now, but the Santiago's are going to take good care of you. I'll be back soon I promise!" As she turned to leave, she felt a small hand grab the back of her work shirt. She turned around to see Jake clutching at her with tears streaming down his face. 

"Don't go!" He whispered sadly, "I don't want you to go!" 

"I know baby. I know. But I need to go to work, if I go to work then we can get money to go on that nice vacation we talked about remember?" 

"But what if you don't come back? What if something happens to me?" Ever since Jake had had been admitted to the hospital with a seizure after the encounter with his Dad, he was afraid that either his mom would leave him too, or that something bad would happen to him and his mom wouldn't be there to help through it. 

"Sweetie, I promise that I'm going to come back. I'm not like your father and I'm not going to leave you. And if something bad happens then the Santiago's will call me, and I'll come rushing from work and I'll be right by your side I promise." Karen told him tearfully, running her hand up and down the small of his back. "Plus, tomorrow's Saturday and I have the whole weekend off, so we can spend the whole weekend watching movies and eating your favorite food! We'll have a lazy weekend, just the two of us. Doesn't that sound great!" She paused for a moment after getting a small nod from Jake. 

"Ok. You can go to work." Jake finally conceded, letting go of his mom's shirt. 

"I'll be back before you even know it. I love you so much!" She whispered, kissing him lightly on the forehead before heading out to work. Jake had always been a pretty independent and happy kid, to see him get so upset about her leaving to go to work because he thought she was going to leave him left her wanting to do nothing more than punch her stupid ex-husband in his stupid neglectful face. She knew that Jake's anxiety and insecurities were heightened because he really wasn't feeling well right now, but to hear him voice his concerns simultaneously broke her heart and made her want to punch a hole in the wall. She needed to be strong, not just for herself, but for him as well. 

After Jake had calmed down and his mother had left for work, he had ended up falling asleep for a little bit, whining and groaning a little bit as he did so. In the few months that the Santiago's had been watching Jake, Camilla had rarely if ever heard him really complain, and for him to be whining and voicing his discomfort meant that he was in some serious pain and there was nothing she could do to lessen it. After managing to somehow get about an hour of sleep, Jake woke up, and he was in even more pain then he was before. His brain couldn't even form words, he just was so sick of being sick, that all he was able to do was let out a pained groaned which immediately got Mrs. Santiago's attention. 

"Oh Jake!" Camilla sighed, looking at the boy's slumped form on her couch, there was sweat pooling on his forehead and his eyes were glazed over and he looked miserable. She knew he had a fever and decided to start by trying to cool him down, according to Karen the fevers were just a regular reaction to this particular chemo and didn't require a trip to the hospital. So, she quickly got a fan and placed it in front of him and sat him up from under the blanket he was under. After removing his sweatshirt and the blanket and found that he was still sweating profusely she decided the next best thing would be to take his shirt off. "I'm going to take your shirt off, I think it's going to help you cool down a bit." 

Jake gave a slight nod and rubbed the sleep from his eyes giving a small sigh as he did so. Despite having just slept for an hour or so he felt more tired than ever, any time he seemed to get comfortable a new part of his body would begin to flare up in pain and he would be jarred awake by it. He couldn't wait to be switched back to his old chemo drug and for all these stupid side effects to go away. He whimpered softly as he lifted his arms for Mrs. Santiago to help him take his shirt off, he wanted to play it off and seem like he was in less pain then he was, but he was in so much pain that he didn't have the energy to keep up any act. 

When she had gotten Jake's shirt off and he's chest was revealed, she gave a quiet gasped and muttered a curse in Spanish, so Jake wouldn't recognize what she was saying. "Oh mijo!" The rash she was looking at more resembled welts, as if he'd been beaten, then a rash. She knew that he must have been in a lot of pain and was amazed that he'd managed to lie down at all. "I know this must hurt Jake, your Mom left some cream to put on the rash if it hurt. Would you like to try it, I think it'll help with your pain?" 

"No! No touching please!" Jake cried, his back and chest already felt like it was on fire with nothing touching him, if Mrs. Santiago put her hands or any cream on him, he couldn't imagine the kind of pain he'd be in. 

"Ok! Ok! No touching! Camilla quickly interjected, trying to calm the boy down, she turned the fan on to a higher setting in hopes that it would help him slightly. After about an hour of sitting there and trying to ease some of Jake's pain, Camilla thought that a bath might help with both the fever and his rash. So, she bridged the idea with him gently. "Jake why don't we try a bath, I think it might help you feel a little bit better. Would you be interested in try it?" She asked softly. 

"Alright." Jake sighed, at this point he was willing to try anything to make his body hurt less. 

Camilla helped him put his shirt back on, carefully picked him up, trying to not cause him anymore pain. She set him on the floor of her children's bathroom as she got the tub filled up with some lukewarm water before helping him take his shirt off again and getting him into the tub. The tension immediately drew out of Jake's muscles as he sat in the water, this was the best in least in pain he'd felt all week. Once she was sure that Jake was going to be okay in the bathroom for a few minutes, she headed into her son Manny's room to fish out a pair of sweatpants for Jake as he was currently sitting in her bathtub with his still on. 

When Jake woke up, he realized that he was back on the Santiago's couch, and not in the bathtub like he had been before. Everything felt a little fuzzy, almost like how felt when he would wake up from surgery in the hospital. He rubbed his eyes in an attempt to make everything seem a little clearer, jumping back in shock a bit when he noticed Amy's head a few feet away from his own. 

"Ames, what are you doing home? Shouldn't you be at school? Did something happen?" 

"Jake, its 4:30 in the afternoon. I've been done with school for like an hour and a half now. You've been asleep since before I got home." Before they had a chance to continue their conversation anymore, Camilla rushed into the room seeing that Jake was awake. 

"How are you feeling mijo? You had a pretty rough afternoon." Camilla sighed, sitting next to Jake on the couch. 

"Ok, just a little fuzzy. Did I take any medicine?" Jake asked, he hadn't remembered taking any. But considering the fact that he was in only a little bit of pain and that he had slept for more than an hour, he thought that maybe he'd taken some. 

"Yes. You woke up once after the bath in a lot of pain. So, I texted your mom and said that it was okay for you to take some of pain medication that your doctors gave you today. Once I got you set back up on the couch, I gave it to you through your line, and you feel back asleep almost immediately." She explained 

"Oh okay. Is it bad that I don't remember any of it?" Jake asked, a concerned feeling beginning to settle in his stomach. 

"No, not at all. You pretty out of it when I gave it to you, it's nothing to be worried about. Would you like anything now that you're awake, you haven't eaten anything since you get here?" 

"Actually, I am a little hungry." Jake said sheepishly. 

"That's good. I'll go and make you and Amy snack while get started on dinner." 

The rest of the day carried on rather uneventfully. Jake and Amy had spent the rest of the afternoon on the couch watching stupid movies and TV shows while Camilla made dinner and her brother's did god knows what. After dinner, the pain medication that Jake had been given had started to wear off so Camilla and Victor did their best to keep him comfortable. They alternated between giving him ice and heat for his back and made an effort not to touch the welts that seemed to have multiplied on his back and stomach. Luckily this time Camilla had been able to convince Jake that using the ointment would actually help him, despite the fact that it would hurt when they put it on. Karen had showed up just in time for that, which is what probably pushed Jake over the edge into agreeing to use it anyway. 

"Are you sure that this is going to work?" Jake asked nervously, he was laying on the couch with his shirt off as mom held some stupid cream in her hand that was supposed to make him feel better, but he highly doubted that. 

"Yes Jake. Terry wouldn't prescribe you something if he didn't think it would work." Karen explained 

"Ok fine, just do it quickly." He mumbled, he really did not want his back and stomach to hurt anymore so the sooner they got this done the better. His mom did not waste anytime starting to rub the cream onto his back, he immediately tensed in pain as he felt it being rubbed over the areas that hurt him the most. He had a feeling that his was a bad idea. A few tears leaked from his eyes as she continued to rub the cream on his stomach now, his grip growing tighter on his mom's free hand that was holding his. Luckily it took only a few more minutes and then he was done and despite the few minutes of pain he felt, he really did feel a lot better. 

Later that night 

As Jake was curled up under the covers in his mom's bed he debated on asking the question that had been on his mind all week. He was afraid of the answer, which is what made him hold off from asking so long. But after the pain of the past few days, he needed to know so he decided to suck it up and ask her. 

"Hey Mom?" Jake asked softly, rolling to face his mom. "Am I dying?" Karen was shocked by her son's question and immediately shut the book she was reading. 

"No sweetie you're not dying! What would make you even think that?" 

"Because I heard Terry say something about the chemo not working, and because I've been so sick this week. I thought that maybe I wasn't getting better." He explained softly. 

"Oh sweetie! When Terry said the chemo wasn't working he was taking about the particular dose you took this week because it made you sick. And all the really bad symptoms were just a side-effect of the treatment this week. That's why Terry's going to switch you back to your old drug next week." She explained, pulling her son into her arms. "You are getting better, the scans from last month showed that a lot of cancer cells died which means that you're getting better. This is not something you need to be worried about!" 

"But what if I stop getting better! I don't want to die!" He cried 

"Jake this isn't something we need to worry about right now, you are getting better so let's not worry about what happens if you stop. We will cross that bridge if we get there. Just relax baby, you're alright!" Karen whispered, rocking him back and forth slightly in an attempt to get him to calm down. She continued to whisper little assurances in his ear until his breathing slowed down and he seemed to have fallen asleep. "I promise we're going to get you through this Jake."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think we're gonna go back to a little Jake and Amy fluff next chapter because we haven't had that in a while. Also please comment and give a kudos if you enjoyed this chapter.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry the chapter seems kind of disjointed, I usually write my chapters in one sitting so that way it flows normally, but I wrote this one in several sittings so the style of writing may change slightly.

It was no secret that Amy Santiago loved school, she loved learning, answer questions and tests, however she was still like any other 8-year-old. She loved being off from school. And in her opinion the best way to get off from school was via a snow day. In her opinion there was something magical about the snow, and the way it covered the ground and the trees, how the sun made it glisten and made it like shiny when it was a fresh snowfall. It had snowed a few times since their family had moved to New York, and she had quickly learned that it took a lot more for New York City schools to close then it did her school in New Jersey. But overnight New York had gotten a little over a foot of snow and that seemed to be just enough for the schools to have to shut down. It had been about 8:00 in the morning when her brother Manny came bustling into her room, yelling that it had snowed, and that school was canceled. It had taken Amy a moment in her half-awake haze to realize what her brother had just said, upon hearing the news she quickly threw her covers off her bed and ran to the window a smiled growing on her face as she saw that the Brooklyn streets were now lined with snow. 

Jake hadn't returned to school after Christmas break, his doctors and mom agreed that as treatments carried on and his body's immune system got lower that it was best the he move to home instruction for the rest of the year. Jake hadn't minded at first, he got wake up late and do school in his pajamas plus on the days he didn't have chemo he wouldn't have had the energy to go to school anyway, however he quickly realized it was quite boring because no one else was home and he was stuck doing schoolwork by himself at the Santiago's house. So, when he woke up to find about a foot of snow on the ground and that school was cancelled, he was thrilled to know that everyone was off and that they could all hang out. Jake had slowly made his way out of the guest room on the first floor into the kitchen, he had relocated downstairs about a week ago after it became too difficult for him to make it up and down the stairs on his own. 

"Hey Mom, can I play out in the snow with Amy and Gina today?" He asked excitedly, taking a seat across from her at the table. 

"Sure, I don't see why not." While Karen was a little weary about sending her sick, slightly unstable son, out to play in the snow, she knew that it was important for him to still do things that a regular kid would do. She found out the Jake had the best weeks when he was able to just be a regular kid, his counts had been the best after Christmas and the Nets game she took him to. So, she decided that having Jake play in the snow with the Santiago's would do him a world of good, especially because he had to go back to the hospital for chemo tomorrow. 

"Really! Thanks!" Jake was surprised that his mom had agreed to let him go play outside so easily, ever since the week were the chemo had given him a bad reaction, she had been pretty uptight about what she let him do. He had figured that it would have taken a little more begging and pleading, along with having to flash his best puppy dog eyes to get her to say yes. So, about an hour and half, and one Gina later the two friends were standing outside the Santiago residence waiting for some of the younger members of the Santiago clan to come and play with them. 

"Hello Jake and Gina. Why don't you come inside Amy and some of the boys are just finishing getting dressed.”? Camilla said inviting the two young children into her home. 

The snow was still freshly falling as Gina, Jake, and about half of the Santiago clan made their way outside to play at park up the street from where they lived. Upon reaching the park they had quick debate on what they should, almost immediately settling on a snowball fight. It would be Jake, Amy and Gina against Alex, Manny and Victor. The pairs of split up and began making forts and their snowball ammunition. Jake very quickly realized that Amy and Gina were much better at making snowballs, every time he tried to pack the snow together it ended up coming apart in his hands. He muttered a few curses under his breath in Hebrew that he'd picked up from his Mom and Nana before giving a slight groan. 

"Do you need help making snowballs?" Amy asked, picking up on Jake's frustration 

"Yeah. I don't exactly have much practice. I usually spend most snow days inside watching movies with Mom." Jake explained, scooping more snow into his hand and trying to pack it into a circle. 

"Well there's a right way to make snowballs, you don't just smush the snow together you know." She told him, adding another ball to the quickly growing pile that she and Gina had created. "Do you want me to show you?" 

"Please!" Jake groaned, as another snowball disintegrated in his hands. Amy talked him through it several times while showing him and the trio quickly learned that Jake was awful at making snowballs so, he decided to start making they fort that they would use to shield themselves from Amy's brothers. The two teams spent about an hour preparing their snowballs and creating forts and little shields to hide behind throughout different parts of the field at the mostly empty park. In the end Amy, Jake and Gina's team, much to the dismay of Amy's brothers who were slightly upset about being beat by a group of third graders. 

"I can't believe you guys beat us!" Alex groaned flopping down on a snowbank next to Amy and her friends. 

"I can you, all of you have terrible aim and just threw at us at random. You didn’t have a plan, dad would be so disappointed." Amy grinned getting some satisfaction from beating her older brothers. 

"You guys had a plan?" Manny questioned, he wanted to say he was surprised. But with Amy directing Jake and Gina around, he would have been shocked if she didn't come up with at least one plan and figured that she probably had a couple. 

"It's Amy, of course we had a plan. She'd completely freak out if we just wung it." Jake laughed, throwing a left-over snowball at Amy. Who glared at him in response, picking one up and throwing it back at him? 

"Are you sure you want to do that Peralta? You know that I could beat you right here right now, I've got several plans that I didn't even tell you about that I could use to kick your butt." 

"I'd like to see you try!" Jake yelled throwing another snowball at Amy, hitting her square in the chest and running to duck behind one of the little forts he'd made. 

"Ohh it's on!" Amy laughed, grabbing a snowball and running after him. 

"I'll bet you 5 bucks that Jake smokes Amy" Victor muttered to his brothers as he watched the two fight. 

"I'll take that action." Gina said sticking her hand out towards Amy's brother, who she'd already forgotten the name of 

"Really? Ok." Victor asked, seeming surprised. "Easiest 5 bucks ever." 

"I wouldn't be so sure of that!" Gina pointed as Amy continued to pelt Jake with snowballs, as Jake tried to change hiding spots and loosely threw snow at her along the way. 

"Alright! Alright you win!" Jake laughed, reaching his hand out indicating that needed help getting up.

"Told you I'd beat you Peralta!" Amy gloated as she grabbed Jake's hands and helped him stand. 

The group hung out in the park for a little while longer, until the wind and snow picked up again and it was no longer enjoyable to be outside. Camilla had also come up the remind Jake that he had to come and take the next dose of his medication and that the kids would probably be better off spending the rest of the day inside as the storm picked up again. Everyone agreed so they began trudging back to the Santiago's house discussing what they were going to do for the rest of the afternoon, until Gina had to get picked up and Jake's mom got off work to pick him, because despite the blizzard people were still going out to eat which meant that Karen had to go to work. 

"Alright take your snow stuff off and leave it by the front door so it can dry, then come in the kitchen I made Mac and Cheese for lunch." The kids stood by the front taking off the heavy coats and snow pants before being reduced to mostly sweatpants and tee shirts, except for Amy who had several layers on underneath her jacket to stay warm because she is cold at all times. 

"So, what do you want to do after lunch?" Amy asked, as they all sat down for lunch. 

"Well I have to take my medication at some point, which means I'm probably not going to be up for much this afternoon." Jake explained sadly, he hated that his medicine had the ability to completely derail his day and make him not want to do things. "We could watch movies. I know that's what we always do when I'm over, but with snow and my medicine I don't know how many other options we have." 

"Ohh I know, how about we make a fort that we can watch movies in!" Amy suggested excitedly, she knew that Jake felt bad that when he had to take his medicine that he couldn't do much, so she tried to think of a fun way for them to watch movies. 

"That sounds awesome! Let's do it!" Jake agreed excitedly, as Amy got murmurs from agreement from Gina and her brothers. 

With the plan to build a fort now in place, the six kids sitting at the table quickly devoured the rest of their lunch as they moved into the family room and started grabbing all the blankets and pillows, they could find to make what they were deeming to be the most epic fort ever. Camilla chuckled as she listened to her daughter boss around her brothers and Jake as they made the fort, Gina was sitting off to the side saying something about how she didn't do manual labor or something. She was glad that her daughter had found friends that were as quirky as she was, especially after she struggled with making friends at their old school in New Jersey. Within a half an hour the fort had mostly taken over the family room and was filled with blankets and pillows galore, their last task was to figure what movie to watch. 

"We should watch Die Hard!" Jake suggested excitedly, wanting to show everyone his favorite movie knowing that none of them had seen it. 

"We're not watching Die Hard." Everyone chorused back, Jake gave a noncommital groan the Santiago's always shot down his idea of watching Die Hard when he came over. 

"What about Star Wars?" Alex suggested, "you've seen Star Wars right Jake?" 

"Are you kidding me! I love Star Wars!" Jake exclaimed 

"I'm sorry what's Star Wars?" Gina asked, looking up from the magazine she'd found and started reading 

"Gina you've seen Star Wars, we watched it last summer at Nana's."

"Was it the one with the short guys and the ring that was super long?" 

"No that was Lord of Rings. Star Wars was the one set in space with Lightsabers and the Chewbacca." Jake explained, trying to jog her memory 

"Yeah, I don't pay attention to half the nerdy movies that we watch at Nana's. I'm too pretty for that." 

"But Gina its Star Wars!" Amy gasped, it may be because she had seven brothers but in her opinion Star Wars was one of the best if not the best movies ever made. 

"You like Star Wars?" Jake asked, his mouth agape 

"Yeah, it's like one of the best movies ever made. My dad's been showing us them since we were little, we own all of them on DVD." 

"How did I not know this? We have so much more stuff we can talk about now!" 

"I guess we're watching Star Wars then." Victor noted, as everyone, except Gina, was excited at watching them. "Should we start with a New Hope and work our way through". Getting some agreeable nods and a confused look for Gina, he went off to try and find the movies. 

"I hate to interrupt, but I have to give Jake his medicine before you start watching. I put it off while you guys built the fort, but he can't really wait anymore." Camilla said poking her head into the fort. "Jake why don't you get comfortable on some of pillows and I'll be right back with your medicine, ok." She smiled softly, as his face drop at the mention of his medication. Jake moved back a little to a section of pillows and blankets that Amy had put together, as he pulled his line out from underneath his shirt. 

"This only take a minute, ok." Jake gave her quick nod before, handing her the bottom of his line. He watched as she cleaned the end of it with a wipe and checked to make sure that she had the correct doses of everything, as she picked up the first syragine of medicine he grabbed onto Amy's hand. 

"I thought now that you had a line it didn't hurt?" Amy asked seeming confused and slightly worried, she didn't want him to be in any pain. 

"It doesn't but it still freaks me out a little, especially since I can usually feel it go inside of me." Jake sighed, feeling slightly relieved that Amy hadn’t let go of his hand since he'd grabbed it. 

"Ohh that makes sense." Amy said quietly, her gaze also fixing on her mom as she put one of the bottles up to the line and push the contents in noting as Jake's grip on her hand tightened as it made its way into his body. She looked up at him, noticing face that could only be described as a combination of disgust and a grimace. She wondered what he felt anytime he was given medication because reactions usually varied from a slight annoyance to him practically gagging. Her mom made quick work of pushing the other two bottles of medication into him, before wiping down the tip of his line and putting a cap on it. 

"Good job Jake, you're all done till after dinner. Enjoy your movie, I'll be back to check on you guys in a little." Camilla smiled at the group of children, before climbing out of the fort. 

"Alright its Star Wars time!" Alex exclaimed as he fished for the remote and hit play. 

About halfway through New Hope, Gina had been picked up Jake's Nana and by the end of the first movie Alex, Victor, and Manny had left to go play with Legos or do something else. Leaving just Jake and Amy alone in the fort to watch the rest of the movies. Jake actually ended up falling asleep about halfway through Empire Strikes Back, to what she guessed was because of his medication. They were nearing the end of Empire Strikes Back when her mom came in to check on them. 

"How are you guys doing?" She asked moving to sit on the other side of her daughter. 

"Good, Jake fell asleep halfway through the movie." She paused, turning her attention back to the movie for a brief second, "I think Jake had a good day today." 

"Ohh you do, what makes you say that?" Camilla questioned 

"We haven't played like we did today since before he got sick. And he was playing and joking more than usual, I haven't seen him this happy since Christmas." Amy smiled, turning her head to look at the best friend who had fallen asleep on her shoulder. 

"That's good, that means all the medicine he's taking is working." 

"What if Jake doesn't get better, then what happens?" Amy hadn't really asked any questions about Jake's treatment since he was first diagnosed, so Camilla wasn't exactly prepared to answer any deep questions about Jake's situation. 

"Well if the medicine he's taking now stops working now then he has a bunch of different options to help him get better. But if none of the medicine works, then he'll die." Camilla explained honestly, feeling tears well up in eyes as they drifted toward Jake's sleeping figure. 

"I don't want him to die." Amy said softly, Camilla was honestly amazed that Amy had lasted thing long without asking her these questions. Her daughter had seen so much of Jake's treatment and seen him go through so much, but that didn't exactly prepare for her trying to explain and help her deal with Jake's mortality. Especially while he was in the room. 

"I don't want him to die either mija, but the treatment's working and that's all we can hope for." 

"I just hope he gets better soon." She whispered, her gaze finally meeting her mother's. Camilla couldn't give any verbal response to her daughter, as she was filled with so much emotion. So, she pulled her daughter close, being carefully not to wake the sleeping boy on the other side of her and planted a kiss on her forehead. She finished watching Empire Strikes Back with them, before excusing herself to make dinner. 

When Amy got up to put on Return of the Jedi, Jake spoke for the first time since he'd fallen asleep during the second movie. "Don't worry, I'm not going to die Ames." 

"You heard that?" Amy questioned sheepily, she hadn't wanted Jake to hear any of that conversation. 

"Yeah, it’s okay to be worried though. I asked my mom the same questions, I know I made her sad, but she still told me that my medicine is working really well, and that Terry thinks that I have a really good chance of getting better!" 

"That's good! You're my best friend, and the first friend I ever really had and not having in you school is already hard enough and I don't know what I'd do if something bad happened to you. After all who am I supposed to make stupid bets with." 

"Don't worry Ames you’re going to be stuck with me for the rest of your life and that's a Peralta guarantee." Jake smirked 

"Alright, pinky promise for it to be official. You can't break a pinky promise." She told him, sticking her pinky out toward him as he latched his with hers. 

"It's official Ames, you're stuck with me for life. You probably just made a huge mistake, but who cares now I get to annoy you for the rest of our lives!" 

"Don't get too cocky Pineapples, just wait until the tables turn and I start pulling pranks on you." 

"I can't wait to see the day that you decide to start pulling pranks on me." 

"Just shut up and watch the movie Jake." She smacked him as she pressed play and moved back to sit next to him. Yeah, she was glad that this idiot was her best friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. Also I always take suggestions for anything I write, so if there is anything or anyone you want to see in this story then comment and I'll see if I can include it. I hope you guys have a great day.


	11. Chapter 11

Being a cancer patient, Jake had gotten very familiar with feeling unwell. As a matter of fact if he were to list out the days he felt good vs the days he felt bad, the bad days would win in a landslide. That being said there were varying degrees of feeling bad, for example there were days where he didn't feel great but it was more so an annoyance to him then anything else, and then there were days were he felt so bad that he thought he would much rather die then continue on the day with what ever pain he was feeling. So when he woke up this morning not feeling his best Jake didn't think much of it. He would go hang out with Santiago's, curl up on their couch and watch movies while his mom went to work, and would come home later that night head to bed and get ready to do it all over again tomorrow. 

He had been at the Santiago's for about 2 hours when Jake felt like he was going to throw up, it wasn't exactly an uncommon occurrence due to all the medication he was on but on days when he didn't have chemo he was usually ok. He chalked it up to it being a bad day. He reached toward the coffee table that sat next to the couch and grabbed the bucket that sat there every time he came over. You throw up on somebody's floor one time, and they're prepared for life. Alright maybe it happened more than one time. He leaned his head over the bucket and gave way to the feeling of nausea that had taken over his body in the past few minutes. Once he finally felt like he wasn't going to be sick anymore he went to get up and empty the bucket and get himself a drink of water to rinse the taste out of his mouth, after all no need to bother the Santiago's when he could do it himself, when he looked down and saw red splotches mixed in with whatever food he'd eaten that day. He thought for a moment, trying to remember what he'd had that day that was red, and when he couldn't think of anything he felt panic shoot through his body. That wasn't red food, it was blood. 

"Mr. and Mrs. Santiago! Something's wrong!" He called out, he was starting to find it difficult to breathe. What if something was wrong with him? What if the blood meant he was dying? He didn't want to go to the hospital, but something was definitely wrong with him and he needed to get it checked it out. 

"What is it? What's wrong Jake?" Victor came rushing into the room, with Amy and Luis hot on his heels. Victor hadn't hear Jake's voice that panicked in a long time. 

"I think I just threw up blood." Jake whispered, his face draining the little color he had. 

"Alright let me see." Victor said, as Jake handed over the bucket to him. Victor had been a police officer for long enough to know what blood looked like, and that was most definitely blood mixed in with content of Jake's lunch. 

"Jake, we're going to need to go to the hospital ok. Your doctor's need to take a look at you, but everything's going to be fine alright." He explained, being freaked out and panicky was not going to help Jake this situation, and he needed Jake to remain calm. "Amy, can you go find your Mom and tell what's going on and Luis grab his hospital bag that Karen left in the guest room." 

"I don't want to go to the hospital." Jake sighed, wringing his hands together anxiously. 

"I know you don't buddy. But it's better for us to go and find out that nothing's wrong with you, then the other way around yeah." Victor reasoned with him, as he scooped him into his arms. 

"Alright I got Jake's bag!" Luis exclaimed, rushing back into the living room where his Dad was. 

"Thank you, now where is Amy and we can be on our way?" Victor asked, noticing that his daughter hadn't returned from her task yet. 

"Hey Dad, Mom's not home. Manny said that she took David out somewhere before as a reward for getting a good grade on his exam or something." Amy groaned, in recent days David had ascended the ranks and had become her mother's favorite. 

"Ok, get the rest of your siblings together and tell them to met us up here and let them know what's going on." Victor sighed, normally he would have just told Luis to stay home and watch over the others but he didn't know how long Camila was going to be with David and he didn't know how serious Jake's problem was so it was safer to bring all of them along rather then leaving Luis in charge of them for an unknown amount of time. 

"I think I'm gonna be sick again." Jake mumbled, shifting in Mr. Santiago's arms. He looked for a way to throw up on the ground without getting it on Mr. Santiago, when he was met with a bucket underneath his chin. 

"It's alright, you're okay." Victor whispered, as he noticed more blood ending up in the bucket. He silently willed for his kids to hurry up, and he really did debate on leaving them their in that moment. But luckily his six kids were in front of him, throwing their shoes on. Each of them in varying states of confusion and disarray. 

Victor quickly ushered his kids out to the car and strapped Jake in, before speeding off toward the hospital. Victor had seven kids and Jake spent a pretty substantial amount of time with them, meaning that Victor was used to some pretty loud and interesting car rides, so on the trip to be met with almost complete and utter silence from his children and the only sound being the soft sounds of whatever pop radio was on he was thrown for a loop. Normally he would have revealed in the quietness but he barely noticed it as thoughts raced through his head between Jake's medical information, who he needed to call and what he needed to write down and have out when the doctor's came to talk to them. 

Upon reaching the hospital, Victor quickly pulled into a spot and grabbed Jake who was getting groggy and having trouble noticing his surroundings as the rest of his children jumped out of the car. He threw his keys to Luis, the only one of the bunch who could drive just in case he needed Luis to leave and go get something. The eight of them rushed into the Emergency Room as Victor explained what was going on. Jake having cancer and no immune system, along with him throwing up blood and his state of consciousness, allowed for them to be seen rather quickly. Nurses came in and immediately getting Jake's line going and checking his temperature, blood pressure and his blood cell counts. Once they had gotten Jake set up, Victor had stepped into the hall to call Karen and to let her know what was going on. After all he wasn't Jake's legal guardian, Karen had let the hospital know that the Santiago's were going to help take care of Jake and had worked it out so that they were able to make some medical decisions for him, but this was something that she needed to be here for. Plus he imagined that Jake was terrified, and that while he was comfortable with the Santiago's he would feel much better if his mother was here with him. 

"Mr. Santiago we are going to have to run some tests on Jake, normally we would wait for his mother to get here but due to the nature of these circumstances we would rather get them started sooner rather then later. Would you mind, signing some forms for us." The nurse explained, handing him a clipboard. He sighed and took it, Karen was trying to get away from work and didn't know when she was going to be able to get here so Victor couldn't even ask them to try and wait for her to get here. He read it over and tried to remember what all the tests were going to do and the varying degrees of pain they were going to explain to Jake so that way he could explain to him what was going on and could keep him as calm as possible. 

"What the nurse say?" Jake asked, trying to sit up in bed a bit. 

"She told me that they're not sure what's wrong yet and that they are going to run some tests to see what's going on. Also I just got off the phone with your mom and she is on her way and she'll be here as soon as possible." 

"Are the tests gonna hurt?" Jake asked softly, he really did not want to be in any pain. 

"Just a little bit, but they're going to try and keep you as comfortable as possible. Now try and get some rest ok." He told him, as he felt his phone buzz in his pocket. He stepped into the hall and pulled it out, noticing that it was Camilla calling him. 

"Hello?" He sighed into the phone, it was only about 2 in the afternoon and the day had felt so long already. 

"Victor, where the hell are you and the kids. I came home with David and you were all gone. No note, no voicemail from you. I was worried sick." Camilla explained 

"I'm at the hospital with Jake, he started throwing up blood. It's been such a whirlwind since we got here and I completely forgot to call you, I have all the kids with me. I didn't know where you were and how long you were going to be, it didn't seem fair to leave Luis alone with the four of them for an unknown amount of time." 

"You could have left them at home, I told Manny that I was taking David out. They would have been fine." 

"Camilla, I'm not going to argue with you about this now. Besides you should have told me that you were going out with David, so that way I could have sat with Jake rather then have him panic and try to find us. Remember we agreed that we weren't going to leave him alone in case something happened, you're lucky that this was nothing serious. I'll talk to you later, Jake's doctor needs to talk to me." Victor sighed hanging up the phone. When they had first agreed to watch Jake for Karen, they had agreed that one of them was always going to be in the room with Jake so that way if anything happened to him one of them would be there to help him through it. But state test scores had just come back and David had done the best out all the kids and had quickly become Camilla's favorite and she had started neglecting some of the other kids and prioritizing him over them. Today was the first case he could think of, where she had prioritized David over Jake. Usually when ever he came over, both he and Camilla made sure to keep a careful eye on him. 

"Hey Victor, so we're going to start some of the tests on Jake. It's nothing too invasive, it's mostly checking his blood cells, bone marrow and spinal fluid to see if this is an infection. If it's not an infection, then it's just because his stomachs irritated from throwing up so much." Terry explained

That's fine, most of my kids are here today. Should I send them somewhere else, or can they stay in room?" Victor asked following the man into the room. 

"They're allowed to stay if they don't get in anyone's way, unless you don't think they'll do well with needles. One of the tests we have to do involves sticking a needle into Jake's hipbone to collect bone marrow." Terry explained. 

"I'll send them out, just to be safe. Well except Amy, you know that there's nothing I can do to pry her from that boy's side." He pulled his kids to the side and explained to them what was going to happen, and they all agreed to head down to the cafeteria to get lunch as they had no interest in seeing a needle stuck into Jake's back, while Terry sat down next to Jake's bed and explained what was going on and how they were going to proceed. 

Within a few moments a variety of nurses and different doctor's had entered the room and started prepping Jake for the tests. He was laying on his side with his tee-shirt off, and a sterile sheet draped over him. Jake had tried adamantly to get them to hold off until Karen got here, but she was stuck in traffic and Terry didn't want Jake sitting around for much longer so Jake would have to preserver with the help of Victor and Amy and Karen on speaker phone. His hand was clutched tightly to Victor's has Terry gave his hip a slight poke while asking if Jake felt anything, they hadn't been able to give him anesthetics because they weren't sure if they would exacerbate the problem at hand. With the shake of Jake's head signaling that he didn't feel anything and Terry pushed the needle into Jake's hip, as Jake immediately burst into tears. Victor loved his kids and Jake very much, but he was not the touchy feely type, usually any physical affection was left to his wife who was much better at it then he was. So Victor did his best to reassure Jake that everything was going to be fine and that this would all be over soon. 

It had been about 2 hours since Jake's tests and they were waiting for the results, Jake had been giving some pain meds and had ended up falling asleep almost immediately after and had stayed that way ever since. Karen was still trying to get over from New Jersey, were she worked on weekends, and he and his kids watched a Yankee game on the small hospital TV in Jake's room.

"Alright I've got some results, luckily nothing was seriously wrong with Jake. It looks like the blood was just because his stomach was irritated from throwing up all the time, while he does have a slight fever, it appears that everything else is fine." 

"That's great so can we take him home." Victor asked, glad to hear that nothing was seriously wrong with Jake. 

"Not quite yet, we did notice that Jake doesn't appear to be getting enough nutrient so we're going to put in a feeding tube while he's here to help get him back towards a healthy weight and make sure he's getting the nutrients he needs to." Terry explained. "We can wait for Karen to get here to do that though, it's nothing dire." 

"Ok, I'll give her a call and let her know." Victor sighed, shaking Terry's hand. 

Victor explained to Karen the test results and that Jake was physically fine and that the blood was from irritation in his stomach and that he would be free to go once they put in the feeding tube. She sighed and told him that she was almost there and thanked him for staying with Jake all day and helping get him through this, Victor couldn't fathom leaving Jake alone in this position and waved her off saying it was no problem. Once he got off the phone with Karen, Victor had to explain to Jake what was going on. Much to no one's surprise Jake wasn't exactly thrilled to have a tube shoved down his throat and have another physical sign that he was not physically well. 

Karen had arrived in a flurry of excitement, profusely apologizing to Jake for not being here and that she had tried to hard to get here for him. Once Karen was there Terry had her sign the paperwork and was getting Jake ready for his feeding tube, wanting to get them home as quickly as possible from the point on. Victor was ready to head out once they were about to start Jake's procedure, when he felt a tiny hand grasp his wrist as he turned around to see Jake holding on to him quietly asking him if he would stay. It would be later on their kids lives when Karen would tell him that Jake had seen him as some kind of father figure after his had left. Victor agreed to stay and took a seat next to Karen, Jake keeping his grip on his hand as he did so. 

"Alright Jake, I'm going to put this in your nose and push it down through you're throat till it's in your stomach. Now while I do this I need you to stay calm and breathe and keep drinking water to help it go down. Got it?" Terry explained, sanitizing the tube. 

"Ok?" Jake replied, he wasn't really sure how this was going to work and would do his best to follow Terry's instructions. 

As the tube went through his nose, Jake thought that maybe this wasn't going to be so bad. But the second it hit his throat, he immediately retracted his previous thought and decided that this was indeed going to be very bad. As the tube worked his way down his throat he couldn't help but gag and a few tears escaped his eyes. His mom was next to him the second she noticed, rubbing her hand over his head and helping him drink the water to make the tube go down, Mr. Santiago had yet to let go of his hand since he grabbed it earlier and had taken to rubbing his thumb over Jake's knuckles. Once the tube was in, Terry placed a piece of medical tape over the part of the tube that sat by his ear, Terry told him it was extra and was there for when the tube was taken out. Jake didn’t really like how the tube felt, but he knew that he would get used to it just like he had his port and his central line. He was just glad that if he didn't feel up to eating that there was a way for him to get what he needed with out having to force himself to try and eat whatever his mom put in front of him while she looked at him with sad eyes. He hated when she looked at him like that, he couldn't help but feel like he was disappointing her, he knew that he wasn't and she told him that many times, but when she was so tired and all she wanted was for him to eat the tiniest bit of food but he couldn't because he felt too sick made him feel so damn guilty.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi sorry for the month long period of radio silence between updates. School has been a bitch the past few weeks and I've had a lot of work to get through. Couple that with writer's block and the fact that I couldn't decide between two ideas for the chapter. Also if y'all have any suggestions or things you want to see in this book, then comment and let me know because I always appreciate ideas.


	12. AN

Hello friends I promise I did not forget this story, things got a little crazy between the end of my semester and finals along with having to deal with death of my grandmother. Hence why I have not updated anything over the past month, I just wanted to give you all a reason why. I'm also struggling with writers block so if you could please leave any suggestions for things you want to see in the story then please leave a comment, I could really use some inspiration. I hope to have the next chapter updated soon! Thank you all for your patience. 

Katie


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